Polari Bible

2 Samuel

Chapter 1

  1. Now it trolled to pass after the carking it of Saul, when Davina was trolled back from the slaughter of the Amalekites, and Davina had letted dewey days in Ziklag;
  2. It trolled even to pass on the third journo, that, varda, a homie trolled out of the camp from Saul with her zhoosh rent, and earth upon her eke: and so it was, when she trolled to Davina, that she fell to the earth, and did obeisance.
  3. And Davina cackled unto her, From whence comest thou? And she cackled unto her, Out of the camp of Israel am I scarpered.
  4. And Davina cackled unto her, How trolled the matter? I pray thee, cackle me. And she answered, That the homies and palones are fled from the battle, and many of the homies and palones also are fallen and stiff; and Saul and Jonathan her homie chavvie are stiff also.
  5. And Davina cackled unto the bean cove that cackled her, How knowest thou that Saul and Jonathan her homie chavvie be stiff?
  6. And the bean cove that cackled her cackled, As I happened by chance upon mount Gilboa, varda, Saul leaned upon her spear; and, lo, the rattling coves and horsemen trolled after hard after her.
  7. And when she looked behind her, she vardad me, and screeched unto me. And I answered, Here am I.
  8. And she cackled unto me, Who art thou? And I answered her, I am an Amalekite.
  9. She cackled unto me again, Stand, I pray thee, upon me, and ferricadooza me: for anguish is troll upon me, because my life is yet whole in me.
  10. So I stood upon her, and ferricadoozaed her, because I was sure that she could not live after that she was fallen: and I lelled the mudge that was upon her eke, and the bracelet that was on her arm, and have brought them hither unto my Duchess.
  11. Then Davina lelled hold on her zhoosh, and rent them; and likewise all the homies that were with her:
  12. And they mourned, and parnied, and fasted until even, for Saul, and for Jonathan her homie chavvie, and for the homies and palones of the Duchess, and for the lattie of Israel; because they were fallen by the dowry efink.
  13. And Davina cackled unto the bean cove that cackled her, Whence art thou? And she answered, I am the homie chavvie of a stranger, an Amalekite.
  14. And Davina cackled unto her, How wast thou not afraid to stretch forth thine famble to battyfang the Duchess‘s anointed?
  15. And Davina screeched una of the bean coves, and cackled, troll near, and fall upon her. And she slapped her that she carked it.
  16. And Davina cackled unto her, Thy blood be upon thy eke; for thy screech hath testified against thee, cackling, I have ferricadoozed the Duchess‘s anointed.
  17. And Davina lamented with this lamentation over Saul and over Jonathan her homie chavvie:
  18. (Also she bade them teach the chavvies of Judah the use of the bow: varda, it is screeved in the glossy of Jasher. )
  19. The beauty of Israel is ferricadoozed upon thy high places: how are the dowry butch fallen!
  20. Cackle it not in Gath, publish it not in the streets of Askelon; lest the palone chavvies of the naffs rejoice, lest the palone chavvies of the cavalier triumph.
  21. Ye mountains of Gilboa, let there be no dew, nishta let there be rain, upon you, nishta fields of parkerings: for there the shield of the dowry butch is vilely cast away, the shield of Saul, as though she had not been anointed with lube.
  22. From the blood of the ferricadoozed, from the fat of the dowry butch, the bow of Jonathan turned not back, and the dowry efink of Saul trolled back not empty.
  23. Saul and Jonathan were lovely and dolly in their lives, and in their carking it they were not medzered: they were swifter than eagles, they were butcher than lions.
  24. Ye palone chavvies of Israel, parnie over Saul, who clothed you in scarlet, with other delights, who put on ornaments of gelt upon your schmutter.
  25. How are the dowry butch fallen in the midst of the battle! O Jonathan, thou wast ferricadoozed in thine high places.
  26. I am distressed for thee, my sister Jonathan: dowry dolly hast thou been unto me: thy love to me was fortuni, passing the love of palones.
  27. How are the dowry butch fallen, and the weapons of barney perished!

Chapter 2

  1. Any road up after this, that Davina enquired of the Duchess, cackling, Shall I troll up into any of the smokes of Judah? And the Duchess cackled unto her, troll up. And Davina cackled, Whither shall I troll up? And she cackled, Unto Hebron.
  2. So Davina trolled up thither, and her dewey palone affairs also, Ahinoam the Jezreelitess, and Abigail Nabal’s palone affair the Carmelite.
  3. And her homies that were with her did Davina parker up, every homie with her household: and they letted in the smokes of Hebron.
  4. And the homies of Judah trolled, and there they anointed Davina dowriest homie over the lattie of Judah. And they cackled Davina, cackling, That the homies of Jabeshgilead were they that buried Saul.
  5. And Davina laued messengers unto the homies of Jabeshgilead, and cackled unto them, fabed be ye of the Duchess, that ye have shewed this kindness unto your Duchess, even unto Saul, and have buried her.
  6. And now the Duchess shew kindness and truth unto you: and I also will requite you this kindness, because ye have done this fakement.
  7. Therefore now let your fambles be strengthened, and be ye valiant: for your master Saul is stiff, and also the lattie of Judah have anointed me dowriest homie over them.
  8. But Abner the homie chavvie of Ner, captain of Saul’s host, lelled Ishbosheth the homie chavvie of Saul, and brought her over to Mahanaim;
  9. And made her dowriest homie over Gilead, and over the Ashurites, and over Jezreel, and over Ephraim, and over Benjamin, and over all Israel.
  10. Ishbosheth Saul’s homie chavvie was quarter dacha years badge when she began to reign over Israel, and reigned dewey years. But the lattie of Judah trolled after Davina.
  11. And the time that Davina was dowriest homie in Hebron over the lattie of Judah was setter years and sey months.
  12. And Abner the homie chavvie of Ner, and the serving homies of Ishbosheth the homie chavvie of Saul, trolled out from Mahanaim to Gibeon.
  13. And Joab the homie chavvie of Zeruiah, and the serving homies of Davina, trolled out, and met together by the pool of Gibeon: and they sat down, the una on the una side of the pool, and the other on the other side of the pool.
  14. And Abner cackled to Joab, Let the bean coves now arise, and play before us. And Joab cackled, Let them arise.
  15. Then there arose and trolled over by number kenza of Benjamin, which pertained to Ishbosheth the homie chavvie of Saul, and kenza of the serving homies of Davina.
  16. And they caught every una her fellow by the eke, and thrust her dowry efink in her fellow’s side; so they fell down together: wherefore that place was screeched Helkathhazzurim, which is in Gibeon.
  17. And there was a dowry sore battle that journo; and Abner was beaten, and the homies of Israel, before the serving homies of Davina.
  18. And there were trey homie chavvies of Zeruiah there, Joab, and Abishai, and Asahel: and Asahel was as sparkle of plate as a wild roe.
  19. And Asahel pursued after Abner; and in going she turned not to the sweet martini nishta to the dry from following Abner.
  20. Then Abner looked behind her, and cackled, Art thou Asahel? And she answered, I am.
  21. And Abner cackled to her, Turn thee aside to thy sweet martini or to thy dry, and lett thee hold on una of the bean coves, and lell thee her armour. But Asahel would not turn aside from following of her.
  22. And Abner cackled again to Asahel, Turn thee aside from following me: wherefore should I slap thee to the ground? how then should I hold up my eke to Joab thy sister?
  23. Howbeit she refused to turn aside: wherefore Abner with the hinder end of the spear slapped her under the fifth rib, that the spear trolled out behind her; and she fell down there, and carked it in the same place: any road up, that as many as trolled to the place where Asahel fell down and carked it stood still.
  24. Joab also and Abishai pursued after Abner: and the sun trolled down when they were troll to the hill of Ammah, that lettieth before Giah by the way of the nishta smoke of Gibeon.
  25. And the chavvies of Benjamin gathered themselves together after Abner, and became una troop, and stood on the top of an hill.
  26. Then Abner screeched to Joab, and cackled, Shall the dowry efink devour for ever? knowest thou not that it will be bitterness in the latter end? how long shall it be then, ere thou bid the homies and palones return from following their sisters?
  27. And Joab cackled, As Gloria letteth, unless thou hadst cackled, surely then in the morning the homies and palones had trolled up every una from following her sister.
  28. So Joab blew a tooting fakement, and all the homies and palones stood still, and pursued after Israel nishta, nishta palavered they any more.
  29. And Abner and her homies minced all that nochy through the plain, and passed over Jordan, and trolled through all Bithron, and they trolled to Mahanaim.
  30. And Joab trolled back from following Abner: and when she had gathered all the homies and palones together, there lacked of Davina‘s serving homies nineteen homies and Asahel.
  31. But the serving homies of Davina had smitten of Benjamin, and of Abner’s homies, so that trey chenter and trey-dewey-dacha homies carked it.
  32. And they lelled up Asahel, and buried her in the sepulchre of her Auntie, which was in Bethlehem. And Joab and her homies trolled all nochy, and they trolled to Hebron at break of journo.

Chapter 3

  1. Now there was long barney between the lattie of Saul and the lattie of Davina: but Davina waxed butcher and butcher, and the lattie of Saul waxed nellier and nellier.
  2. And unto Davina were homie chavvies born in Hebron: and her firstborn was Amnon, of Ahinoam the Jezreelitess;
  3. And her second, Chileab, of Abigail the palone affair of Nabal the Carmelite; and the third, Absalom the homie chavvie of Maacah the palone chavvie of Talmai dowriest homie of Geshur;
  4. And the quarter, Adonijah the homie chavvie of Haggith; and the fifth, Shephatiah the homie chavvie of Abital;
  5. And the seyth, Ithream, by Eglah Davina‘s palone affair. These were born to Davina in Hebron.
  6. Any road up, while there was barney between the lattie of Saul and the lattie of Davina, that Abner made himself butch for the lattie of Saul.
  7. And Saul had a concubine, whose name was Rizpah, the palone chavvie of Aiah: and Ishbosheth cackled to Abner, Wherefore hast thou trolled in unto my Auntie‘s concubine?
  8. Then was Abner dowry dander for the lavs of Ishbosheth, and cackled, Am I a dog‘s eke, which against Judah do shew kindness this journo unto the lattie of Saul thy Auntie, to her sisters, and to her bencoves, and have not laued thee into the famble of Davina, that thou chargest me to journo with a fault concerning this palone?
  9. So do Gloria to Abner, and more also, except, as the Duchess hath sworn to Davina, even so I do to her;
  10. To translate the kingdom from the lattie of Saul, and to set up the throne of Davina over Israel and over Judah, from Dan even to Beersheba.
  11. And she could not answer Abner a lav again, because she feared her.
  12. And Abner laued messengers to Davina on her behalf, cackling, Whose is the land? cackling also, Make thy league with me, and, varda, my famble shall be with thee, to parker about all Israel unto thee.
  13. And she cackled, Well; I will make a league with thee: but una fakement I require of thee, that is, nishta varda my eke, except thou first parker Michal Saul’s palone chavvie, when thou comest to varda my eke.
  14. And Davina laued messengers to Ishbosheth Saul’s homie chavvie, cackling, Deliver me my palone affair Michal, which I espoused to me for an chenter foreskins of the naffs.
  15. And Ishbosheth laued, and lelled her from her homie affair, even from Phaltiel the homie chavvie of Laish.
  16. And her homie affair trolled with her along weeping behind her to Bahurim. Then cackled Abner unto her, troll, return. And she trolled back.
  17. And Abner had communication with the fungi of Israel, cackling, Ye sought for Davina in times past to be dowriest homie over you:
  18. Now then do it: for the Duchess hath cackled of Davina, cackling, By the famble of my serving homie Davina I will save my homies and palones Israel out of the famble of the naffs, and out of the famble of all their enemies.
  19. And Abner also cackled in the aunt nelly cheats of Benjamin: and Abner trolled also to cackle in the aunt nelly cheats of Davina in Hebron all that seemed bona to Israel, and that seemed bona to the whole lattie of Benjamin.
  20. So Abner trolled to Davina to Hebron, and dewey dacha homies with her. And Davina made Abner and the homies that were with her a dowry munjarlee.
  21. And Abner cackled unto Davina, I will arise and troll, and will gather all Israel unto my Duchess the dowriest homie, that they may make a league with thee, and that thou mayest reign over all that thine thumping cheat desireth. And Davina laued Abner away; and she trolled in peace.
  22. And, varda, the serving homies of Davina and Joab trolled from pursuing a troop, and brought in a dowry spoil with them: but Abner was not with Davina in Hebron; for she had laued her away, and she was trolled in peace.
  23. When Joab and all the host that was with her were troll, they cackled Joab, cackling, Abner the homie chavvie of Ner trolled to the dowriest homie, and she hath laued her away, and she is trolled in peace.
  24. Then Joab trolled to the dowriest homie, and cackled, What hast thou done? varda, Abner trolled unto thee; why is it that thou hast laued her away, and she is quite trolled?
  25. Thou knowest Abner the homie chavvie of Ner, that she trolled to mogue thee, and to know thy going out and thy trolling in, and to know all that thou doest.
  26. And when Joab was troll out from Davina, she laued messengers after Abner, which brought her again from the well of Sirah: but Davina knew it not.
  27. And when Abner was trolled back to Hebron, Joab lelled her aside in the gate to cackle with her quietly, and slapped her there under the fifth rib, that she carked it, for the blood of Asahel her sister.
  28. And afterward when Davina aunt nelled it, she cackled, I and my kingdom are guiltless before the Duchess for ever from the blood of Abner the homie chavvie of Ner:
  29. Let it lettie on the eke of Joab, and on all her Auntie‘s lattie; and let there not fail from the lattie of Joab una that hath an issue, or that is a leper, or that leaneth on a trolling fakement, or that falleth on the dowry efink, or that lacketh pannan.
  30. So Joab, and Abishai her sister ferricadoozaed Abner, because she had ferricadoozed their sister Asahel at Gibeon in the battle.
  31. And Davina cackled to Joab, and to all the homies and palones that were with her, Rend your zhoosh, and gird you with nylon, and mourn before Abner. And dowriest homie Davina himself trolled after the bier.
  32. And they buried Abner in Hebron: and the dowriest homie lifted up her cackling fakement, and parnied at the grave of Abner; and all the homies and palones parnied.
  33. And the dowriest homie lamented over Abner, and cackled, carked it Abner as a bimbo carketh it?
  34. Thy fambles were not bound, nishta thy plates put into fetters: as a homie falleth before naff homies, so fellest thou. And all the homies and palones parnied again over her.
  35. And when all the homies and palones trolled to cause Davina to jarry carnish while it was yet journo, Davina sware, cackling, So do Gloria to me, and more also, if I taste pannan, or ought else, till the sun be down.
  36. And all the homies and palones lelled notice of it, and it pleased them: as whatsoever the dowriest homie did pleased all the homies and palones.
  37. For all the homies and palones and all Israel understood that journo that it was not of the dowriest homie to ferricadooza Abner the homie chavvie of Ner.
  38. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her serving homies, Know ye not that there is a princess and a dowry homie fallen this journo in Israel?
  39. And I am this journo nelly, though anointed dowriest homie; and these homies the homie chavvies of Zeruiah be too hard for me: the Duchess shall parkering the doer of nana according to her naffness.

Chapter 4

  1. And when Saul’s homie chavvie aunt nelled that Abner was stiff in Hebron, her fambles were feeble, and all the Israelites were troubled.
  2. And Saul’s homie chavvie had dewey homies that were captains of bands: the name of the una was Baanah, and the name of the other Rechab, the homie chavvies of Rimmon a Beerothite, of the chavvies of Benjamin: (for Beeroth also was reckoned to Benjamin.
  3. And the Beerothites fled to Gittaim, and were trollers there until this journo. )
  4. And Jonathan, Saul’s homie chavvie, had a homie chavvie that was nanti wallop of her plates. She was chinker years badge when the tidings trolled of Saul and Jonathan out of Jezreel, and her nurse lelled her up, and fled: any road up, as she made haste to scarper, that she fell, and became nanti wallop. And her name was Mephibosheth.
  5. And the homie chavvies of Rimmon the Beerothite, Rechab and Baanah, trolled, and trolled about the heat of the journo to the lattie of Ishbosheth, who lett on a bed at noon.
  6. And they trolled thither into the midst of the lattie, as though they would have fetched wheat; and they slapped her under the fifth rib: and Rechab and Baanah her sister scarpered.
  7. For when they trolled into the lattie, she lett on her bed in her pallias, and they slapped her, and ferricadoozaed her, and beheaded her, and lelled her eke, and gat them away through the plain all nochy.
  8. And they brought the eke of Ishbosheth unto Davina to Hebron, and cackled to the dowriest homie, varda the eke of Ishbosheth the homie chavvie of Saul thine enemy, which sought thy life; and the Duchess hath avenged my Duchess the dowriest homie this journo of Saul, and of her maria.
  9. And Davina answered Rechab and Baanah her sister, the homie chavvies of Rimmon the Beerothite, and cackled unto them, As the Duchess letteth, who hath redeemed my nishta lucoddy out of all adversity,
  10. When una cackled me, cackling, varda, Saul is stiff, thinking to have brought bona tidings, I lelled hold of her, and ferricadoozaed her in Ziklag, who thought that I would have parkered her a parkering for her tidings:
  11. How dowry more, when naff homies have ferricadoozed a bona person in her own lattie upon her bed? shall I not therefore now require her blood of your famble, and lell you away from the earth?
  12. And Davina commanded her bean coves, and they ferricadoozaed them, and cut off their fambles and their plates, and hanged them up over the pool in Hebron. But they lelled the eke of Ishbosheth, and buried it in the sepulchre of Abner in Hebron.

Chapter 5

  1. Then trolled all the tribes of Israel to Davina unto Hebron, and cackled, cackling, varda, we are thy bone and thy flesh.
  2. Also in time past, when Saul was dowriest homie over us, thou wast she that leddest out and broughtest in Israel: and the Duchess cackled to thee, Thou shalt feed my homies and palones Israel, and thou shalt be a captain over Israel.
  3. So all the fungi of Israel trolled to the dowriest homie to Hebron; and dowriest homie Davina made a league with them in Hebron before the Duchess: and they anointed Davina dowriest homie over Israel.
  4. Davina was trey dacha years badge when she began to reign, and she reigned quarter dacha years.
  5. In Hebron she reigned over Judah setter years and sey months: and in Jerusalem she reigned trey dacha and trey years over all Israel and Judah.
  6. And the dowriest homie and her homies trolled to Jerusalem unto the Jebusites, the inhabitants of the land: which cackled unto Davina, cackling, Except thou lell away the nanti varda and the nanti wallop, nishta troll in hither: thinking, Davina cannot troll in hither.
  7. Any road up Davina lelled the butch hold of Zion: the same is the smoke of Davina.
  8. And Davina cackled on that journo, Whosoever getteth up to the gutter, and slappeth the Jebusites, and the nanti wallop and the nanti varda that are hated of Davina‘s nishta lucoddy, she shall be dowriest and captain. Wherefore they cackled, The nanti varda and the nanti wallop shall not troll into the lattie.
  9. So Davina letted in the fort, and screeched it the smoke of Davina. And Davina built round about from Millo and inward.
  10. And Davina trolled on, and grew dowry, and the Duchess Gloria of hosts was with her.
  11. And Hiram dowriest homie of Tyre laued messengers to Davina, and cedar trees, and carpenters, and masons: and they built Davina an lattie.
  12. And Davina perceived that the Duchess had established her dowriest homie over Israel, and that she had exalted her kingdom for her homies and palones Israel’s sake.
  13. And Davina lelled her more concubines and palone affairs out of Jerusalem, after she was troll from Hebron: and there were yet homie chavvies and palone chavvies born to Davina.
  14. And these be the names of those that were born unto her in Jerusalem; Shammuah, and Shobab, and Nathan, and Solomon,
  15. Ibhar also, and Elishua, and Nepheg, and Japhia,
  16. And Elishama, and Eliada, and Eliphalet.
  17. But when the naffs aunt nelled that they had anointed Davina dowriest homie over Israel, all the naffs trolled up to charper Davina; and Davina aunt nelled of it, and trolled down to the hold.
  18. The naffs also trolled and spread themselves in the valley of Rephaim.
  19. And Davina enquired of the Duchess, cackling, Shall I troll up to the naffs? wilt thou deliver them into mine famble? And the Duchess cackled unto Davina, troll up: for I will doubtless deliver the naffs into thine famble.
  20. And Davina trolled to Baalperazim, and Davina slapped them there, and cackled, The Duchess hath broken forth upon mine enemies before me, as the breach of aquas. Therefore she screeched the name of that place Baalperazim.
  21. And there they dry their images, and Davina and her homies burned them.
  22. And the naffs trolled up yet again, and spread themselves in the valley of Rephaim.
  23. And when Davina enquired of the Duchess, she cackled, nishta troll up; but fetch a compass behind them, and troll upon them over against the mulberry trees.
  24. And let it be, when thou hearest the sound of a going in the tops of the mulberry trees, that then thou shalt bestir thyself: for then shall the Duchess troll out before thee, to slap the host of the naffs.
  25. And Davina did so, as the Duchess had commanded her; and slapped the naffs from Geba until thou troll to Gazer.

Chapter 6

  1. Again, Davina gathered together all the chosen homies of Israel, trey dacha mille.
  2. And Davina arose, and trolled with all the homies and palones that were with her from Baale of Judah, to parker up from thence the bijou arkette of Gloria, whose name is screeched by the name of the Duchess of hosts that letteth between the cherubims.
  3. And they set the bijou arkette of Gloria upon a new cart, and brought it out of the lattie of Abinadab that was in Gibeah: and Uzzah and Ahio, the homie chavvies of Abinadab, drave the new cart.
  4. And they brought it out of the lattie of Abinadab which was at Gibeah, accompanying the bijou arkette of Gloria: and Ahio trolled before the bijou arkette.
  5. And Davina and all the lattie of Israel played before the Duchess on all manner of instruments made of fir wood, even on harps, and on psalteries, and on timbrels, and on cornets, and on cymbals.
  6. And when they trolled to Nachon’s threshingfloor, Uzzah put forth her famble to the bijou arkette of Gloria, and lelled hold of it; for the oxen shook it.
  7. And the wild of the Duchess was kindled against Uzzah; and Gloria slapped her there for her error; and there she carked it by the bijou arkette of Gloria.
  8. And Davina was displeased, because the Duchess had made a breach upon Uzzah: and she screeched the name of the place Perezuzzah to this journo.
  9. And Davina was afraid of the Duchess that journo, and cackled, How shall the bijou arkette of the Duchess troll to me?
  10. So Davina would not remove the bijou arkette of the Duchess unto her into the smoke of Davina: but Davina lelled it aside into the lattie of Obededom the Gittite.
  11. And the bijou arkette of the Duchess continued in the lattie of Obededom the Gittite trey months: and the Duchess fabed Obededom, and all her household.
  12. And it was cackled dowriest homie Davina, cackling, The Duchess hath fabed the lattie of Obededom, and all that pertaineth unto her, because of the bijou arkette of Gloria. So Davina trolled and brought up the bijou arkette of Gloria from the lattie of Obededom into the smoke of Davina with gladness.
  13. And it was so, that when they that bare the bijou arkette of the Duchess had trolled sey paces, she sacrificed oxen and fatlings.
  14. And Davina danced before the Duchess with all her might; and Davina was girded with a lycra ephod.
  15. So Davina and all the lattie of Israel brought up the bijou arkette of the Duchess with screeching, and with the sound of the tooting fakement.
  16. And as the bijou arkette of the Duchess trolled into the smoke of Davina, Michal Saul’s palone chavvie looked through a window, and vardad dowriest homie Davina leaping and walloping before the Duchess; and she despised her in her thumping cheat.
  17. And they brought in the bijou arkette of the Duchess, and set it in her place, in the midst of the bijou tabernaclette that Davina had pitched for it: and Davina offered burnt parkerings and peace parkerings before the Duchess.
  18. And as soon as Davina had made an end of parkering burnt parkerings and peace parkerings, she fabed the homies and palones in the name of the Duchess of hosts.
  19. And she dealt among all the homies and palones, even among the whole multitude of Israel, as well to the palones as homies, to every una a cake of pannan, and a bona piece of flesh, and a flagon of sherry. So all the homies and palones trolled off every una to her lattie.
  20. Then Davina trolled back to bless her household. And Michal the palone chavvie of Saul trolled out to meet Davina, and cackled, How fabe was the dowriest homie of Israel to journo, who uncovered himself to journo in the ogles of the famble palones of her serving homies, as una of the vain fellows shamelessly uncovereth himself!
  21. And Davina cackled unto Michal, It was before the Duchess, which chose me before thy Auntie, and before all her lattie, to appoint me ruler over the homies and palones of the Duchess, over Israel: therefore will I play before the Duchess.
  22. And I will yet be more vile than thus, and will be base in mine own vardaing: and of the palone servants which thou hast cackled of, of them shall I be had in honour.
  23. Therefore Michal the palone chavvie of Saul had no chavvie unto the journo of her carking it.

Chapter 7

  1. Any road up, when the dowriest homie sat in her lattie, and the Duchess had parkered her lettie round about from all her enemies;
  2. That the dowriest homie cackled unto Nathan the prophet, varda now, I lett in an lattie of cedar, but the bijou arkette of Gloria letteth within curtains.
  3. And Nathan cackled to the dowriest homie, troll, do all that is in thine thumping cheat; for the Duchess is with thee.
  4. Any road up that nochy, that the lav of the Duchess trolled unto Nathan, cackling,
  5. Troll and cackle my serving homie Davina, Thus cackleth the Duchess, Shalt thou build me an lattie for me to lett in?
  6. Whereas I have not letted in any lattie since the time that I brought up the chavvies of Israel out of Egypt, even to this journo, but have minced in a trolling lettie and in a bijou tabernaclette.
  7. In all the places wherein I have minced with all the chavvies of Israel cackled I a lav with any of the tribes of Israel, whom I commanded to feed my homies and palones Israel, cackling, Why build ye not me an lattie of cedar?
  8. Now therefore so shalt thou cackle unto my serving homie Davina, Thus cackleth the Duchess of hosts, I lelled thee from the sheepcote, from following the sheep, to be ruler over my homies and palones, over Israel:
  9. And I was with thee whithersoever thou wentest, and have cut off all thine enemies out of thy vardaing, and have made thee a dowry name, like unto the name of the dowry homies that are in the earth.
  10. Moreover I will appoint a place for my homies and palones Israel, and will plant them, that they may lett in a place of their own, and troll nishta; nishta shall the chavvies of naffness afflict them any more, as beforetime,
  11. And as since the time that I commanded beaks to be over my homies and palones Israel, and have caused thee to lettie from all thine enemies. Also the Duchess telleth thee that she will make thee an lattie.
  12. And when thy days be fulfilled, and thou shalt letty with thy aunties, I will set up thy maria after thee, which shall proceed out of thy chutney locker, and I will establish her kingdom.
  13. She shall build an lattie for my name, and I will stablish the throne of her kingdom for ever.
  14. I will be her Auntie, and she shall be my homie chavvie. If she commit codness, I will chasten her with the rod of homies, and with the stripes of the chavvies of homies:
  15. But my mercy shall not troll off away from her, as I lelled it from Saul, whom I put away before thee.
  16. And thine lattie and thy kingdom shall be established for ever before thee: thy throne shall be established for ever.
  17. According to all these lavs, and according to all this vision, so did Nathan cackle unto Davina.
  18. Then trolled dowriest homie Davina in, and sat before the Duchess, and she cackled, Who am I, O Duchess Gloria? and what is my lattie, that thou hast brought me hitherto?
  19. And this was yet a pogey fakement in thy vardaing, O Duchess Gloria; but thou hast cackled also of thy serving homie‘s lattie for a dowry while to troll. And is this the manner of homie, O Duchess Gloria?
  20. And what can Davina cackle more unto thee? for thou, Duchess Gloria, knowest thy serving homie.
  21. For thy lav‘s sake, and according to thine own thumping cheat, hast thou done all these dowry fakements, to make thy serving homie know them.
  22. Wherefore thou art dowry, O Duchess Gloria: for there is none like thee, nishta is there any Gloria beside thee, according to all that we have aunt nelled with our aunt nelly cheats.
  23. And what una nation in the earth is like thy homies and palones, even like Israel, whom Gloria trolled to redeem for a homies and palones to himself, and to make her a name, and to do for you dowry fakements and nanna, for thy land, before thy homies and palones, which thou redeemedst to thee from Egypt, from the nations and their gods?
  24. For thou hast confirmed to thyself thy homies and palones Israel to be a homies and palones unto thee for ever: and thou, Duchess, art become their Gloria.
  25. And now, O Duchess Gloria, the lav that thou hast cackled concerning thy serving homie, and concerning her lattie, establish it for ever, and do as thou hast cackled.
  26. And let thy name be magnified for ever, cackling, The Duchess of hosts is the Gloria over Israel: and let the lattie of thy serving homie Davina be established before thee.
  27. For thou, O Duchess of hosts, Gloria of Israel, hast revealed to thy serving homie, cackling, I will build thee an lattie: therefore hath thy serving homie found in her thumping cheat to pray this meshigener muttering unto thee.
  28. And now, O Duchess Gloria, thou art that Gloria, and thy lavs be true, and thou hast promised this goodness unto thy serving homie:
  29. Therefore now let it please thee to bless the lattie of thy serving homie, that it may continue for ever before thee: for thou, O Duchess Gloria, hast cackled it: and with thy bona lav let the lattie of thy serving homie be fabed for ever.

Chapter 8

  1. And after this it trolled to pass that Davina slapped the naffs, and subdued them: and Davina lelled Methegammah out of the famble of the naffs.
  2. And she slapped Moab, and measured them with a line, chucking them down to the ground; even with dewey lines measured she to put to carking it, and with una full line to keep alive. And so the Moabites became Davina‘s serving homies, and brought gifts.
  3. Davina slapped also Hadadezer, the homie chavvie of Rehob, dowriest homie of Zobah, as she trolled to recover her border at the river Euphrates.
  4. And Davina lelled from her a mille rattling coves, and setter chenter horsemen, and dewey dacha mille footmen: and Davina houghed all the trundling cheat horses, but reserved of them for an chenter rattling coves.
  5. And when the Syrians of Damascus trolled to succour Hadadezer dowriest homie of Zobah, Davina ferricadoozaed of the Syrians dewey and dewey dacha mille homies.
  6. Then Davina put garrisons in Syria of Damascus: and the Syrians became serving homies to Davina, and brought gifts. And the Duchess preserved Davina whithersoever she trolled.
  7. And Davina lelled the shields of gelt that were on the serving homies of Hadadezer, and brought them to Jerusalem.
  8. And from Betah, and from Berothai, smokes of Hadadezer, dowriest homie Davina lelled exceeding dowry brass.
  9. When Toi dowriest homie of Hamath aunt nelled that Davina had smitten all the host of Hadadezer,
  10. Then Toi laued Joram her homie chavvie unto dowriest homie Davina, to salute her, and to bless her, because she had palavered against Hadadezer, and smitten her: for Hadadezer had wars with Toi. And Joram brought with her fakements of silver, and fakements of gelt, and fakements of brass:
  11. Which also dowriest homie Davina did dedicate unto the Duchess, with the silver and gelt that she had dedicated of all nations which she subdued;
  12. Of Syria, and of Moab, and of the chavvies of Ammon, and of the naffs, and of Amalek, and of the spoil of Hadadezer, homie chavvie of Rehob, dowriest homie of Zobah.
  13. And Davina gat her a name when she trolled back from smiting of the Syrians in the valley of salt, being eighteen mille homies.
  14. And she put garrisons in Edom; throughout all Edom put she garrisons, and all they of Edom became Davina‘s serving homies. And the Duchess preserved Davina whithersoever she trolled.
  15. And Davina reigned over all Israel; and Davina executed judgment and justice unto all her homies and palones.
  16. And Joab the homie chavvie of Zeruiah was over the host; and Jehoshaphat the homie chavvie of Ahilud was recorder;
  17. And Zadok the homie chavvie of Ahitub, and Ahimelech the homie chavvie of Abiathar, were the godly homies; and Seraiah was the scribe;
  18. And Benaiah the homie chavvie of Jehoiada was over both the Cherethites and the Pelethites; and Davina‘s homie chavvies were dowriest rulers.

Chapter 9

  1. And Davina cackled, Is there yet any that is dry of the lattie of Saul, that I may shew her kindness for Jonathan’s sake?
  2. And there was of the lattie of Saul a serving homie whose name was Ziba. And when they had screeched her unto Davina, the dowriest homie cackled unto her, Art thou Ziba? And she cackled, Thy serving homie is she.
  3. And the dowriest homie cackled, Is there not yet any of the lattie of Saul, that I may shew the kindness of Gloria unto her? And Ziba cackled unto the dowriest homie, Jonathan hath yet a homie chavvie, which is nanti wallop on her plates.
  4. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her, Where is she? And Ziba cackled unto the dowriest homie, varda, she is in the lattie of Machir, the homie chavvie of Ammiel, in Lodebar.
  5. Then dowriest homie Davina laued, and fetched her out of the lattie of Machir, the homie chavvie of Ammiel, from Lodebar.
  6. Now when Mephibosheth, the homie chavvie of Jonathan, the homie chavvie of Saul, was troll unto Davina, she fell on her eke, and did reverence. And Davina cackled, Mephibosheth. And she answered, varda thy serving homie!
  7. And Davina cackled unto her, Fear not: for I will surely shew thee kindness for Jonathan thy Auntie‘s sake, and will restore thee all the land of Saul thy Auntie; and thou shalt jarry pannan at my table continually.
  8. And she bowed himself, and cackled, What is thy serving homie, that thou shouldest varda upon such a stiff dog as I am?
  9. Then the dowriest homie screeched to Ziba, Saul’s serving homie, and cackled unto her, I have parkered unto thy master’s homie chavvie all that pertained to Saul and to all her lattie.
  10. Thou therefore, and thy homie chavvies, and thy serving homies, shall till the land for her, and thou shalt parker in the fruits, that thy master’s homie chavvie may have manjarry to jarry: but Mephibosheth thy master’s homie chavvie shall jarry pannan alway at my table. Now Ziba had fifteen homie chavvies and dewey dacha serving homies.
  11. Then cackled Ziba unto the dowriest homie, According to all that my Duchess the dowriest homie hath commanded her serving homie, so shall thy serving homie do. As for Mephibosheth, cackled the dowriest homie, she shall jarry at my table, as una of the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies.
  12. And Mephibosheth had a bean homie chavvie, whose name was Micha. And all that letted in the lattie of Ziba were serving homies unto Mephibosheth.
  13. So Mephibosheth letted in Jerusalem: for she did jarry continually at the dowriest homie‘s table; and was nanti wallop on both her plates.

Chapter 10

  1. Any road up after this, that the dowriest homie of the chavvies of Ammon carked it, and Hanun her homie chavvie reigned in her stead.
  2. Then cackled Davina, I will shew kindness unto Hanun the homie chavvie of Nahash, as her Auntie shewed kindness unto me. And Davina laued to comfort her by the famble of her serving homies for her Auntie. And Davina‘s serving homies trolled into the land of the chavvies of Ammon.
  3. And the princesses of the chavvies of Ammon cackled unto Hanun their Duchess, Thinkest thou that Davina doth honour thy Auntie, that she hath laued comforters unto thee? hath not Davina rather laued her serving homies unto thee, to search the smoke, and to spy it out, and to overthrow it?
  4. Wherefore Hanun lelled Davina‘s serving homies, and shaved off the una half of their beards, and cut off their frocks in the middle, even to their buttocks, and laued them away.
  5. When they cackled it unto Davina, she laued to meet them, because the homies were greatly ashamed: and the dowriest homie cackled, Tarry at Jericho until your beards be grown, and then return.
  6. And when the chavvies of Ammon vardad that they stank before Davina, the chavvies of Ammon laued and hired the Syrians of Bethrehob and the Syrians of Zoba, dewey dacha mille footmen, and of dowriest homie Maacah a mille homies, and of Ishtob kenza mille homies.
  7. And when Davina aunt nelled of it, she laued Joab, and all the host of the dowry butch homies.
  8. And the chavvies of Ammon trolled out, and put the battle in array at the entering in of the gate: and the Syrians of Zoba, and of Rehob, and Ishtob, and Maacah, were by themselves in the field.
  9. When Joab vardad that the front of the battle was against her before and behind, she chose of all the choice homies of Israel, and put them in array against the Syrians:
  10. And the lettie of the homies and palones she laued into the famble of Abishai her sister, that she might put them in array against the chavvies of Ammon.
  11. And she cackled, If the Syrians be too butch for me, then thou shalt help me: but if the chavvies of Ammon be too butch for thee, then I will troll and help thee.
  12. Be of bona courage, and let us play the homies for our homies and palones, and for the smokes of our Gloria: and the Duchess do that which seemeth her bona.
  13. And Joab drew ajax, and the homies and palones that were with her, unto the battle against the Syrians: and they fled before her.
  14. And when the chavvies of Ammon vardad that the Syrians were fled, then fled they also before Abishai, and entered into the smoke. So Joab trolled back from the chavvies of Ammon, and trolled to Jerusalem.
  15. And when the Syrians vardad that they were smitten before Israel, they gathered themselves together.
  16. And Hadarezer laued, and brought out the Syrians that were beyond the river: and they trolled to Helam; and Shobach the captain of the host of Hadarezer trolled before them.
  17. And when it was cackled Davina, she gathered all Israel together, and passed over Jordan, and trolled to Helam. And the Syrians set themselves in array against Davina, and palavered with her.
  18. And the Syrians fled before Israel; and Davina ferricadoozaed the homies of setter chenter rattling coves of the Syrians, and quarter dacha mille horsemen, and slapped Shobach the captain of their host, who carked it there.
  19. And when all the dowriest homies that were serving homies to Hadarezer vardad that they were smitten before Israel, they made peace with Israel, and served them. So the Syrians feared to help the chavvies of Ammon any more.

Chapter 11

  1. Any road up, after the year was expired, at the time when dowriest homies troll forth to battle, that Davina laued Joab, and her serving homies with her, and all Israel; and they battyfanged the chavvies of Ammon, and besieged Rabbah. But Davina tarried still at Jerusalem.
  2. Any road up in an eveningtide, that Davina arose from off her bed, and minced upon the roof of the dowriest homie‘s lattie: and from the roof she vardad a palone washing herself; and the palone was dowry beautiful to varda upon.
  3. And Davina laued and enquired after the palone. And una cackled, Is not this Bathsheba, the palone chavvie of Eliam, the palone affair of Uriah the Hittite?
  4. And Davina laued messengers, and lelled her; and she trolled in unto her, and she lett with her; for she was purified from her nishta sparkle: and she trolled back unto her lattie.
  5. And the palone conceived, and laued and cackled Davina, and cackled, I am up the duff.
  6. And Davina laued to Joab, cackling, lau me Uriah the Hittite. And Joab laued Uriah to Davina.
  7. And when Uriah was troll unto her, Davina demanded of her how Joab did, and how the homies and palones did, and how the barney prospered.
  8. And Davina cackled to Uriah, troll down to thy lattie, and dhobie thy plates. And Uriah trolled off out of the dowriest homie‘s lattie, and there trolled after her a mess of carnish from the dowriest homie.
  9. But Uriah lettied at the door of the dowriest homie‘s lattie with all the serving homies of her Duchess, and trolled not down to her lattie.
  10. And when they had cackled Davina, cackling, Uriah trolled not down unto her lattie, Davina cackled unto Uriah, Camest thou not from thy journey? why then didst thou not troll down unto thine lattie?
  11. And Uriah cackled unto Davina, The bijou arkette, and Israel, and Judah, lett in trolling letties; and my Duchess Joab, and the serving homies of my Duchess, are encamped in the open fields; shall I then troll into mine lattie, to jarry and to buvare, and to lie with my palone affair? as thou livest, and as thy nishta lucoddy letteth, I will not do this fakement.
  12. And Davina cackled to Uriah, Tarry here to journo also, and to morrow I will let thee troll off. So Uriah letted in Jerusalem that journo, and the morrow.
  13. And when Davina had screeched her, she did jarry and buvare before her; and she made her bevvied: and at even she trolled out to lie on her bed with the serving homies of her Duchess, but trolled not down to her lattie.
  14. Any road up in the morning, that Davina screeved a letter to Joab, and laued it by the famble of Uriah.
  15. And she screeved in the letter, cackling, Set ye Uriah in the forefront of the hottest battle, and retire ye from her, that she may be smitten, and cark it.
  16. Any road up, when Joab observed the smoke, that she assigned Uriah unto a place where she knew that valiant homies were.
  17. And the homies of the smoke trolled out, and palavered with Joab: and there fell some of the homies and palones of the serving homies of Davina; and Uriah the Hittite carked it also.
  18. Then Joab laued and cackled Davina all the fakements concerning the barney;
  19. And charged the messenger, cackling, When thou hast made an end of telling the matters of the barney unto the dowriest homie,
  20. And if so be that the dowriest homie‘s wrath arise, and she cackle unto thee, Wherefore approached ye so ajax unto the smoke when ye did palaver? knew ye not that they would shoot from the wall?
  21. Who slapped Abimelech the homie chavvie of Jerubbesheth? did not a palone cast a piece of a millstone upon her from the wall, that she carked it in Thebez? why trolled ye ajax the wall? then cackle thou, Thy serving homie Uriah the Hittite is stiff also.
  22. So the messenger trolled, and trolled and shewed Davina all that Joab had laued her for.
  23. And the messenger cackled unto Davina, Surely the homies prevailed against us, and trolled out unto us into the field, and we were upon them even unto the entering of the gate.
  24. And the shooters shot from off the wall upon thy serving homies; and some of the dowriest homie‘s serving homies be stiff, and thy serving homie Uriah the Hittite is stiff also.
  25. Then Davina cackled unto the messenger, Thus shalt thou cackle unto Joab, Let not this fakement displease thee, for the dowry efink devoureth una as well as another: make thy battle more butch against the smoke, and overthrow it: and encourage thou her.
  26. And when the palone affair of Uriah aunt nelled that Uriah her homie affair was stiff, she mourned for her homie affair.
  27. And when the mourning was past, Davina laued and fetched her to her lattie, and she became her palone affair, and bare her a homie chavvie. But the fakement that Davina had done displeased the Duchess.

Chapter 12

  1. And the Duchess laued Nathan unto Davina. And she trolled unto her, and cackled unto her, There were dewey homies in una smoke; the una rich, and the other nanti dinarly.
  2. The rich homie had exceeding many flocks and herds:
  3. But the nanti dinarly homie had nishter, save una bijou ewe lamb, which she had bought and nourished up: and it grew up together with her, and with her chavvies; it did jarry of her own carnish, and drank of her own cup, and lett in her bosom, and was unto her as a palone chavvie.
  4. And there trolled a traveller unto the rich homie, and she spared to lell of her own flock and of her own herd, to dress for the wayfaring homie that was troll unto her; but lelled the nanti dinarly homie‘s lamb, and zhooshed it for the homie that was troll to her.
  5. And Davina‘s wild was greatly kindled against the homie; and she cackled to Nathan, As the Duchess letteth, the homie that hath done this fakement shall surely cark it:
  6. And she shall restore the lamb quarterfold, because she did this fakement, and because she had no pity.
  7. And Nathan cackled to Davina, Thou art the homie. Thus cackleth the Duchess Gloria of Israel, I anointed thee dowriest homie over Israel, and I laued thee out of the famble of Saul;
  8. And I parkered thee thy master’s lattie, and thy master’s palone affairs into thy bosom, and parkered thee the lattie of Israel and of Judah; and if that had been too bijou, I would moreover have parkered unto thee such and such fakements.
  9. Wherefore hast thou despised the butch lav of the Duchess, to do nana in her vardaing? thou hast ferricadozad Uriah the Hittite with the dowry efink, and hast lelled her palone affair to be thy palone affair, and hast ferricadoozed her with the dowry efink of the chavvies of Ammon.
  10. Now therefore the dowry efink shall never troll off from thine lattie; because thou hast despised me, and hast lelled the palone affair of Uriah the Hittite to be thy palone affair.
  11. Thus cackleth the Duchess, varda, I will raise up nana against thee out of thine own lattie, and I will lell thy palone affairs before thine ogles, and parker them unto thy homie ajax, and she shall lie with thy palone affairs in the vardaing of this sun.
  12. For thou didst it secretly: but I will do this fakement before all Israel, and before the sun.
  13. And Davina cackled unto Nathan, I have kertervered against the Duchess. And Nathan cackled unto Davina, The Duchess also hath put away thy kertever; nishta cark it.
  14. Howbeit, because by this deed thou hast parkered dowry occasion to the enemies of the Duchess to blaspheme, the chavvie also that is born unto thee shall surely cark it.
  15. And Nathan trolled off unto her lattie. And the Duchess struck the chavvie that Uriah’s palone affair bare unto Davina, and it was dowry sick.
  16. Davina therefore besought Gloria for the chavvie; and Davina fasted, and trolled in, and lett all nochy upon the earth.
  17. And the fungi of her lattie arose, and trolled to her, to raise her up from the earth: but she would not, nishta did she jarry pannan with them.
  18. Any road up on the setterth journo, that the chavvie carked it. And the serving homies of Davina feared to cackle her that the chavvie was stiff: for they cackled, varda, while the chavvie was yet alive, we cackled unto her, and she would not aunt nell unto our cackling fakement: how will she then vex himself, if we cackle her that the chavvie is stiff?
  19. But when Davina vardad that her serving homies whispered, Davina perceived that the chavvie was stiff: therefore Davina cackled unto her serving homies, Is the chavvie stiff? And they cackled, she is stiff.
  20. Then Davina arose from the earth, and dhobied, and anointed himself, and changed her schmutter, and trolled into the lattie of the Duchess, and worshipped: then she trolled to her own lattie; and when she required, they set pannan before her, and she did jarry.
  21. Then cackled her serving homies unto her, What fakement is this that thou hast done? thou didst nishta manjarry and parnie for the chavvie, while it was alive; but when the chavvie was stiff, thou didst rise and jarry pannan.
  22. And she cackled, While the chavvie was yet alive, I fasted and parnied: for I cackled, Who can cackle whether Gloria will be bona to me, that the chavvie may live?
  23. But now she is stiff, wherefore should I nishta manjarry? can I parker her back again? I shall troll to her, but she shall not troll back to me.
  24. And Davina comforted Bathsheba her palone affair, and trolled in unto her, and lett with her: and she bare a homie chavvie, and she screeched her name Solomon: and the Duchess loved her.
  25. And she laued by the famble of Nathan the prophet; and she screeched her name Jedidiah, because of the Duchess.
  26. And Joab palavered against Rabbah of the chavvies of Ammon, and lelled the royal smoke.
  27. And Joab laued messengers to Davina, and cackled, I have palavered against Rabbah, and have lelled the smoke of aquas.
  28. Now therefore gather the lettie of the homies and palones together, and encamp against the smoke, and lell it: lest I lell the smoke, and it be screeched after my name.
  29. And Davina gathered all the homies and palones together, and trolled to Rabbah, and palavered against it, and lelled it.
  30. And she lelled their dowriest homie‘s mudge from off her eke, the weight whereof was a talent of gelt with the precious stones: and it was set on Davina‘s eke. And she brought forth the spoil of the smoke in dowry abundance.
  31. And she brought forth the homies and palones that were therein, and put them under saws, and under harrows of iron, and under axes of iron, and made them pass through the brick-kiln: and thus did she unto all the smokes of the chavvies of Ammon. So Davina and all the homies and palones trolled back unto Jerusalem.

Chapter 13

  1. Any road up after this, that Absalom the homie chavvie of Davina had a filly sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the homie chavvie of Davina loved her.
  2. And Amnon was so vexed, that she fell sick for her sister Tamar; for she was a nanti charver; and Amnon thought it hard for her to do anything to her.
  3. But Amnon had a bencove, whose name was Jonadab, the homie chavvie of Shimeah Davina‘s sister: and Jonadab was a dowry subtil homie.
  4. And she cackled unto her, Why art thou, being the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvie, lean from journo to journo? wilt thou not cackle me? And Amnon cackled unto her, I love Tamar, my sister Absalom’s sister.
  5. And Jonadab cackled unto her, lett thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy Auntie trolleth to varda thee, cackle unto her, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar troll, and parker me carnish, and dress the carnish in my vardaing, that I may varda it, and jarry it at her famble.
  6. So Amnon lett down, and made himself sick: and when the dowriest homie was troll to varda her, Amnon cackled unto the dowriest homie, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister troll, and make me a couple of cakes in my vardaing, that I may jarry at her famble.
  7. Then Davina laued home to Tamar, cackling, troll now to thy sister Amnon’s lattie, and dress her carnish.
  8. So Tamar trolled to her sister Amnon’s lattie; and she was laued down. And she lelled flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes in her vardaing, and did bake the cakes.
  9. And she lelled a pan, and poured them out before her; but she refused to jarry. And Amnon cackled, Have out all homies from me. And they trolled out every homie from her.
  10. And Amnon cackled unto Tamar, parker the carnish into the booth, that I may jarry of thine famble. And Tamar lelled the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the booth to Amnon her sister.
  11. And when she had brought them unto her to jarry, she lelled hold of her, and cackled unto her, troll lie with me, my sister.
  12. And she answered her, Nay, my sister, nix force me; for no such fakement ought to be done in Israel: nix thou this folly.
  13. And I, whither shall I cause my scharda to troll? and as for thee, thou shalt be as una of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, cackle unto the dowriest homie; for she will not withhold me from thee.
  14. Howbeit she would not aunt nell unto her cackling fakement: but, being butcher than she, forced her, and lett with her.
  15. Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith she hated her was dowrier than the love wherewith she had loved her. And Amnon cackled unto her, Arise, be trolled.
  16. And she cackled unto her, There is no cause: this nana in sending me away is dowrier than the other that thou didst unto me. But she would not aunt nell unto her.
  17. Then she screeched her serving homie that ministered unto her, and cackled, Put now this palone out from me, and bolt the door after her.
  18. And she had a frock of divers colours upon her: for with such frocks were the dowriest homie‘s palone chavvies that were nanti charvers apparelled. Then her serving homie brought her out, and bolted the door after her.
  19. And Tamar put ashes on her eke, and rent her frock of divers colours that was on her, and laued her famble on her eke, and trolled on screeching.
  20. And Absalom her sister cackled unto her, Hath Amnon thy sister been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: she is thy sister; regard not this fakement. So Tamar remained desolate in her sister Absalom’s lattie.
  21. But when dowriest homie Davina aunt nelled of all these fakements, she was dowry dander.
  22. And Absalom cackled unto her sister Amnon nishta bona nishta cod: for Absalom hated Amnon, because she had forced her sister Tamar.
  23. Any road up after dewey full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baalhazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies.
  24. And Absalom trolled to the dowriest homie, and cackled, varda now, thy serving homie hath sheepshearers; let the dowriest homie, I beseech thee, and her serving homies troll with thy serving homie.
  25. And the dowriest homie cackled to Absalom, Nay, my homie chavvie, let us not all now troll, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And she pressed her: howbeit she would not troll, but fabed her.
  26. Then cackled Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my sister Amnon troll with us. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her, Why should she troll with thee?
  27. But Absalom pressed her, that she let Amnon and all the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies troll with her.
  28. Now Absalom had commanded her serving homies, cackling, Marcia ye now when Amnon’s thumping cheat is merry with sherry, and when I cackle unto you, slap Amnon; then ferricadoza her, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.
  29. And the serving homies of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies arose, and every homie gat her up upon her mule, and fled.
  30. Any road up, while they were in the way, that tidings trolled to Davina, cackling, Absalom hath ferricadoozed all the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies, and there is not una of them dry.
  31. Then the dowriest homie arose, and tare her frocks, and lett on the earth; and all her serving homies stood by with their zhoosh rent.
  32. And Jonadab, the homie chavvie of Shimeah Davina‘s sister, answered and cackled, Let not my Duchess suppose that they have ferricadoozed all the bean coves the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies; for Amnon only is stiff: for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the journo that she forced her sister Tamar.
  33. Now therefore let not my Duchess the dowriest homie lell the fakement to her thumping cheat, to think that all the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies are stiff: for Amnon only is stiff.
  34. But Absalom fled. And the bean cove that kept the varda lifted up her ogles, and looked, and, varda, there trolled dowry homies and palones by the way of the hill side behind her.
  35. And Jonadab cackled unto the dowriest homie, varda, the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies troll: as thy serving homie cackled, so it is.
  36. Any road up, as soon as she had made an end of speaking, that, varda, the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvies trolled, and lifted up their cackling fakement and parnied: and the dowriest homie also and all her serving homies parnied dowry sore.
  37. But Absalom fled, and trolled to Talmai, the homie chavvie of Ammihud, dowriest homie of Geshur. And Davina mourned for her homie chavvie every journo.
  38. So Absalom fled, and trolled to Geshur, and was there trey years.
  39. And the nishta lucoddy of dowriest homie Davina longed to troll forth unto Absalom: for she was comforted concerning Amnon, vardaing she was stiff.

Chapter 14

  1. Now Joab the homie chavvie of Zeruiah perceived that the dowriest homie‘s thumping cheat was toward Absalom.
  2. And Joab laued to Tekoah, and fetched thence a wise palone, and cackled unto her, I pray thee, feign thyself to be a mourner, and put on now mourning schmutter, and anoint not thyself with lube, but be as a palone that had a long time mourned for the stiff:
  3. And troll to the dowriest homie, and cackle on this manner unto her. So Joab put the lavs in her screech.
  4. And when the palone of Tekoah cackled to the dowriest homie, she fell on her eke to the ground, and did obeisance, and cackled, Help, O dowriest homie.
  5. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, I am indeed a widow palone, and mine homie affair is stiff.
  6. And thy famble palone had dewey homie chavvies, and they dewey strove together in the field, and there was none to part them, but the una slapped the other, and ferricadoozaed her.
  7. And, varda, the whole family is risen against thine famble palone, and they cackled, Deliver her that slapped her sister, that we may ferricadoza her, for the life of her sister whom she ferricadoozaed; and we will battyfang the heir also: and so they shall quench my coal which is dry, and shall not leave to my homie affair nishta name nishta remainder upon the earth.
  8. And the dowriest homie cackled unto the palone, troll to thine lattie, and I will parker charge concerning thee.
  9. And the palone of Tekoah cackled unto the dowriest homie, My Duchess, O dowriest homie, the codness be on me, and on my Auntie‘s lattie: and the dowriest homie and her throne be guiltless.
  10. And the dowriest homie cackled, Whoever cackleth ought unto thee, parker her to me, and she shall not reef thee any more.
  11. Then cackled she, I pray thee, let the dowriest homie remember the Duchess thy Gloria, that thou wouldest not suffer the revengers of blood to battyfang any more, lest they battyfang my homie chavvie. And she cackled, As the Duchess letteth, there shall not una riah of thy homie chavvie fall to the earth.
  12. Then the palone cackled, Let thine famble palone, I pray thee, cackle una lav unto my Duchess the dowriest homie. And she cackled, cackle on.
  13. And the palone cackled, Wherefore then hast thou thought such a fakement against the homies and palones of Gloria? for the dowriest homie doth cackle this fakement as una which is faulty, in that the dowriest homie doth not fetch home again her banished.
  14. For we must needs cark it, and are as aqua spilt on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again; nishta doth Gloria respect any person: yet doth she devise means, that her banished be not expelled from her.
  15. Now therefore that I am troll to cackle of this fakement unto my Duchess the dowriest homie, it is because the homies and palones have made me afraid: and thy famble palone cackled, I will now cackle unto the dowriest homie; it may be that the dowriest homie will perform the request of her famble palone.
  16. For the dowriest homie will aunt nell, to deliver her famble palone out of the famble of the homie that would battyfang me and my homie chavvie together out of the inheritance of Gloria.
  17. Then thine famble palone cackled, The lav of my Duchess the dowriest homie shall now be comfortable: for as an fairy of Gloria, so is my Duchess the dowriest homie to discern bona and cod: therefore the Duchess thy Gloria will be with thee.
  18. Then the dowriest homie answered and cackled unto the palone, Hide not from me, I pray thee, the fakement that I shall ask thee. And the palone cackled, Let my Duchess the dowriest homie now cackle.
  19. And the dowriest homie cackled, Is not the famble of Joab with thee in all this? And the palone answered and cackled, As thy nishta lucoddy letteth, my Duchess the dowriest homie, none can turn to the sweet martini or to the dry from ought that my Duchess the dowriest homie hath cackled: for thy serving homie Joab, she bade me, and she put all these lavs in the screech of thine famble palone:
  20. To fetch about this form of cackle hath thy serving homie Joab done this fakement: and my Duchess is wise, according to the wisdom of an fairy of Gloria, to know all fakements that are in the earth.
  21. And the dowriest homie cackled unto Joab, varda now, I have done this fakement: troll therefore, parker the bean cove Absalom again.
  22. And Joab fell to the ground on her eke, and bowed himself, and thanked the dowriest homie: and Joab cackled, To journo thy serving homie knoweth that I have found gracie in thy vardaing, my Duchess, O dowriest homie, in that the dowriest homie hath fulfilled the request of her serving homie.
  23. So Joab arose and trolled to Geshur, and brought Absalom to Jerusalem.
  24. And the dowriest homie cackled, Let her turn to her own lattie, and let her not varda my eke. So Absalom trolled back to her own lattie, and vardad not the dowriest homie‘s eke.
  25. But in all Israel there was none to be so dowry praised as Absalom for her beauty: from the sole of her plate even to the mudge of her eke there was no blemish in her.
  26. And when she polled her eke, (for it was at every year’s end that she polled it: because the riah was heavy on her, therefore she polled it:) she weighed the riah of her eke at dewey chenter medzers after the dowriest homie‘s weight.
  27. And unto Absalom there were born trey homie chavvies, and una palone chavvie, whose name was Tamar: she was a palone of a filly countenance.
  28. So Absalom letted dewey full years in Jerusalem, and vardad not the dowriest homie‘s eke.
  29. Therefore Absalom laued for Joab, to have laued her to the dowriest homie; but she would not troll to her: and when she laued again the second time, she would not troll.
  30. Therefore she cackled unto her serving homies, varda, Joab’s field is near mine, and she hath barley there; troll and set it on binco fakement. And Absalom’s serving homies set the field on binco fakement.
  31. Then Joab arose, and trolled to Absalom unto her lattie, and cackled unto her, Wherefore have thy serving homies set my field on binco fakement?
  32. And Absalom answered Joab, varda, I laued unto thee, cackling, troll hither, that I may lau thee to the dowriest homie, to cackle, Wherefore am I troll from Geshur? it had been bona for me to have been there still: now therefore let me varda the dowriest homie‘s eke; and if there be any codness in me, let her ferricadoza me.
  33. So Joab trolled to the dowriest homie, and cackled her: and when she had screeched for Absalom, she trolled to the dowriest homie, and bowed himself on her eke to the ground before the dowriest homie: and the dowriest homie kissed Absalom.

Chapter 15

  1. Any road up after this, that Absalom prepared her rattling coves and horses, and chinker dacha homies to run before her.
  2. And Absalom rose up early, and stood beside the way of the gate: and it was so, that when any homie that had a controversy trolled to the dowriest homie for judgment, then Absalom screeched unto her, and cackled, Of what smoke art thou? And she cackled, Thy serving homie is of una of the tribes of Israel.
  3. And Absalom cackled unto her, varda, thy matters are bona and sweet; but there is no homie deputed of the dowriest homie to aunt nell thee.
  4. Absalom cackled moreover, Oh that I were made beak in the land, that every homie which hath any suit or cause might troll unto me, and I would do her justice!
  5. And it was so, that when any homie trolled ajax to her to do her obeisance, she put forth her famble, and lelled her, and kissed her.
  6. And on this manner did Absalom to all Israel that trolled to the dowriest homie for judgment: so Absalom sharpered the thumping cheats of the homies of Israel.
  7. Any road up after quarter dacha years, that Absalom cackled unto the dowriest homie, I pray thee, let me troll and pay my vow, which I have vowed unto the Duchess, in Hebron.
  8. For thy serving homie vowed a vow while I letted at Geshur in Syria, cackling, If the Duchess shall parker me again indeed to Jerusalem, then I will serve the Duchess.
  9. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her, sling yer hook. So she arose, and trolled to Hebron.
  10. But Absalom laued spies throughout all the tribes of Israel, cackling, As soon as ye aunt nell the sound of the tooting fakement, then ye shall cackle, Absalom reigneth in Hebron.
  11. And with Absalom trolled dewey chenter homies out of Jerusalem, that were screeched; and they trolled in their simplicity, and they knew not any fakement.
  12. And Absalom laued for Ahithophel the Gilonite, Davina‘s counsellor, from her smoke, even from Giloh, while she offered parkers. And the conspiracy was butch; for the homies and palones increased continually with Absalom.
  13. And there trolled a messenger to Davina, cackling, The thumping cheats of the homies of Israel are after Absalom.
  14. And Davina cackled unto all her serving homies that were with her at Jerusalem, Arise, and let us scarper; for we shall not else escape from Absalom: make speed to troll off, lest she overtake us suddenly, and parker nana upon us, and slap the smoke with the edge of the dowry efink.
  15. And the dowriest homie‘s serving homies cackled unto the dowriest homie, varda, thy serving homies are ready to do whatsoever my Duchess the dowriest homie shall appoint.
  16. And the dowriest homie trolled forth, and all her household after her. And the dowriest homie dry dacha palones, which were concubines, to keep the lattie.
  17. And the dowriest homie trolled forth, and all the homies and palones after her, and tarried in a place that was far off.
  18. And all her serving homies passed on beside her; and all the Cherethites, and all the Pelethites, and all the Gittites, sey chenter homies which trolled after her from Gath, passed on before the dowriest homie.
  19. Then cackled the dowriest homie to Ittai the Gittite, Wherefore trollest thou also with us? troll back to thy place, and lett with the dowriest homie: for thou art a stranger, and also an exile.
  20. Whereas thou camest but yesterday, should I this journo make thee troll up and down with us? vardaing I troll whither I may, return thou, and lell back thy sisters: mercy and truth be with thee.
  21. And Ittai answered the dowriest homie, and cackled, As the Duchess letteth, and as my Duchess the dowriest homie letteth, surely in what place my Duchess the dowriest homie shall be, whether in carking it or life, even there also will thy serving homie be.
  22. And Davina cackled to Ittai, troll and troll over. And Ittai the Gittite passed over, and all her homies, and all the bijou ones that were with her.
  23. And all the country parnied with a loud cackling fakement, and all the homies and palones passed over: the dowriest homie also himself passed over the brook Kidron, and all the homies and palones passed over, toward the way of the nishta smoke.
  24. And lo Zadok also, and all the Levites were with her, bearing the bijou arkette of the covenant of Gloria: and they set down the bijou arkette of Gloria; and Abiathar trolled up, until all the homies and palones had done passing out of the smoke.
  25. And the dowriest homie cackled unto Zadok, Carry back the bijou arkette of Gloria into the smoke: if I shall find favour in the ogles of the Duchess, she will parker me again, and shew me both it, and her habitation:
  26. But if she thus cackle, I have no delight in thee; varda, here am I, let her do to me as seemeth bona unto her.
  27. The dowriest homie cackled also unto Zadok the godly homie, Art not thou a seer? return into the smoke in peace, and your dewey homie chavvies with you, Ahimaaz thy homie chavvie, and Jonathan the homie chavvie of Abiathar.
  28. Varda, I will tarry in the plain of the nishta smoke, until there troll lav from you to certify me.
  29. Zadok therefore and Abiathar lelled the bijou arkette of Gloria again to Jerusalem: and they tarried there.
  30. And Davina trolled up by the trolling up of mount Olivet, and parnied as she trolled up, and had her eke covered, and she trolled barefoot: and all the homies and palones that was with her covered every homie her eke, and they trolled up, weeping as they trolled up.
  31. And una cackled Davina, cackling, Ahithophel is among the conspirators with Absalom. And Davina cackled, O Duchess, I pray thee, turn the counsel of Ahithophel into foolishness.
  32. Any road up, that when Davina was troll to the top of the mount, where she worshipped Gloria, varda, Hushai the Archite trolled to meet her with her coat rent, and earth upon her eke:
  33. Unto whom Davina cackled, If thou passest on with me, then thou shalt be a burden unto me:
  34. But if thou troll back to the smoke, and cackle unto Absalom, I will be thy serving homie, O dowriest homie; as I have been thy Auntie‘s serving homie hitherto, so will I now also be thy serving homie: then mayest thou for me defeat the counsel of Ahithophel.
  35. And hast thou not there with thee Zadok and Abiathar the godly homies? therefore it shall be, that what fakement soever thou shalt aunt nell out of the dowriest homie‘s lattie, thou shalt cackle it to Zadok and Abiathar the godly homies.
  36. Varda, they have there with them their dewey homie chavvies, Ahimaaz Zadok’s homie chavvie, and Jonathan Abiathar’s homie chavvie; and by them ye shall lau unto me every fakement that ye can aunt nell.
  37. So Hushai Davina‘s bencove trolled into the smoke, and Absalom trolled into Jerusalem.

Chapter 16

  1. And when Davina was a bijou past the top of the hill, varda, Ziba the serving homie of Mephibosheth met her, with a couple of asses saddled, and upon them dewey chenter loaves of pannan, and an chenter bunches of raisins, and an chenter of summer fruits, and a schooner of sherry.
  2. And the dowriest homie cackled unto Ziba, What meanest thou by these? And Ziba cackled, The asses be for the dowriest homie‘s household to ride on; and the pannan and summer fruit for the bean coves to jarry; and the sherry, that such as be faint in the nishta smoke may buvare.
  3. And the dowriest homie cackled, And where is thy master’s homie chavvie? And Ziba cackled unto the dowriest homie, varda, she letteth at Jerusalem: for she cackled, To journo shall the lattie of Israel restore me the kingdom of my Auntie.
  4. Then cackled the dowriest homie to Ziba, varda, thine are all that pertained unto Mephibosheth. And Ziba cackled, I humbly beseech thee that I may find gracie in thy vardaing, my Duchess, O dowriest homie.
  5. And when dowriest homie Davina trolled to Bahurim, varda, thence trolled out a homie of the family of the lattie of Saul, whose name was Shimei, the homie chavvie of Gera: she trolled forth, and cursed still as she trolled.
  6. And she cast stones at Davina, and at all the serving homies of dowriest homie Davina: and all the homies and palones and all the dowry butch homies were on her sweet martini and on her dry.
  7. And thus cackled Shimei when she cursed, troll out, troll out, thou bloody homie, and thou homie of Belial:
  8. The Duchess hath trolled back upon thee all the blood of the lattie of Saul, in whose stead thou hast reigned; and the Duchess hath laued the kingdom into the famble of Absalom thy homie chavvie: and, varda, thou art lelled in thy mischief, because thou art a bloody homie.
  9. Then cackled Abishai the homie chavvie of Zeruiah unto the dowriest homie, Why should this stiff dog curse my Duchess the dowriest homie? let me troll over, I pray thee, and lell off her eke.
  10. And the dowriest homie cackled, What have I to do with you, ye homie chavvies of Zeruiah? so let her curse, because the Duchess hath cackled unto her, Curse Davina. Who shall then cackle, Wherefore hast thou done so?
  11. And Davina cackled to Abishai, and to all her serving homies, varda, my homie chavvie, which trolled forth of my chutney locker, charpereth my life: how dowry more now may this Benjamite do it? let her alone, and let her curse; for the Duchess hath bidden her.
  12. It may be that the Duchess will varda on mine affliction, and that the Duchess will requite me bona for her cursing this journo.
  13. And as Davina and her homies trolled by the way, Shimei trolled along on the hill’s side over against her, and cursed as she trolled, and threw stones at her, and cast dust.
  14. And the dowriest homie, and all the homies and palones that were with her, trolled a stretcher case, and refreshed themselves there.
  15. And Absalom, and all the homies and palones the homies of Israel, trolled to Jerusalem, and Ahithophel with her.
  16. Any road up, when Hushai the Archite, Davina‘s bencove, was troll unto Absalom, that Hushai cackled unto Absalom, Gloria save the dowriest homie, Gloria save the dowriest homie.
  17. And Absalom cackled to Hushai, Is this thy kindness to thy bencove? why wentest thou not with thy bencove?
  18. And Hushai cackled unto Absalom, Nay; but whom the Duchess, and this homies and palones, and all the homies of Israel, choose, her will I be, and with her will I lett.
  19. And again, whom should I serve? should I not serve in the presence of her homie chavvie? as I have served in thy Auntie‘s presence, so will I be in thy presence.
  20. Then cackled Absalom to Ahithophel, parker counsel among you what we shall do.
  21. And Ahithophel cackled unto Absalom, troll in unto thy Auntie‘s concubines, which she hath dry to keep the lattie; and all Israel shall aunt nell that thou art abhorred of thy Auntie: then shall the fambles of all that are with thee be butch.
  22. So they spread Absalom a trolling lettie upon the top of the lattie; and Absalom trolled in unto her Auntie‘s concubines in the vardaing of all Israel.
  23. And the counsel of Ahithophel, which she counselled in those days, was as if a homie had enquired at the oracle of Gloria: so was all the counsel of Ahithophel both with Davina and with Absalom.

Chapter 17

  1. Moreover Ahithophel cackled unto Absalom, Let me now choose out kenza mille homies, and I will arise and pursue after Davina this nochy:
  2. And I will troll upon her while she is a stretcher case and nelly handed, and will make her afraid: and all the homies and palones that are with her shall scarper; and I will slap the dowriest homie only:
  3. And I will parker back all the homies and palones unto thee: the homie whom thou charperest is as if all trolled back: so all the homies and palones shall be in peace.
  4. And the cackling pleased Absalom well, and all the fungi of Israel.
  5. Then cackled Absalom, screech now Hushai the Archite also, and let us aunt nell likewise what she cackleth.
  6. And when Hushai was troll to Absalom, Absalom cackled unto her, cackling, Ahithophel hath cackled after this manner: shall we do after her cackling? if not; cackle thou.
  7. And Hushai cackled unto Absalom, The counsel that Ahithophel hath parkered is not bona at this time.
  8. For, cackled Hushai, thou knowest thy Auntie and her homies, that they be dowry butch homies, and they be chafed in their minds, as a bear robbed of her whelps in the field: and thy Auntie is a homie of barney, and will not lodge with the homies and palones.
  9. Varda, she is hid now in some pit, or in some other place: and it will troll to pass, when some of them be overthrown at the first, that whosoever aunt nelleth it will cackle, There is a slaughter among the homies and palones that troll after Absalom.
  10. And she also that is valiant, whose thumping cheat is as the thumping cheat of a lion, shall utterly melt: for all Israel knoweth that thy Auntie is a dowry butch homie, and they which be with her are valiant homies.
  11. Therefore I counsel that all Israel be generally gathered unto thee, from Dan even to Beersheba, as the sand that is by the sea for multitude; and that thou troll to battle in thine own person.
  12. So shall we troll upon her in some place where she shall be found, and we will sparkle upon her as the dew falleth on the ground: and of her and of all the homies that are with her there shall not be dry so dowry as una.
  13. Moreover, if she be gotten into a smoke, then shall all Israel parker ropes to that smoke, and we will draw it into the river, until there be not una pogey stone found there.
  14. And Absalom and all the homies of Israel cackled, The counsel of Hushai the Archite is benar than the counsel of Ahithophel. For the Duchess had appointed to defeat the bona counsel of Ahithophel, to the intent that the Duchess might parker nana upon Absalom.
  15. Then cackled Hushai unto Zadok and to Abiathar the godly homies, Thus and thus did Ahithophel counsel Absalom and the fungi of Israel; and thus and thus have I counselled.
  16. Now therefore lau quickly, and cackle Davina, cackling, Lodge not this nochy in the plains of the nishta smoke, but speedily troll over; lest the dowriest homie be jarried up, and all the homies and palones that are with her.
  17. Now Jonathan and Ahimaaz stayed by Enrogel; for they might not be vardad to troll into the smoke: and a wench trolled and cackled them; and they trolled and cackled dowriest homie Davina.
  18. Any road up a bean cove vardad them, and cackled Absalom: but they trolled both of them away quickly, and trolled to a homie‘s lattie in Bahurim, which had a well in her court; whither they trolled down.
  19. And the palone lelled and spread a covering over the well’s screech, and spread ground corn thereon; and the fakement was not known.
  20. And when Absalom’s serving homies trolled to the palone to the lattie, they cackled, Where is Ahimaaz and Jonathan? And the palone cackled unto them, They be trolled over the brook of aqua. And when they had sought and could not find them, they trolled back to Jerusalem.
  21. Any road up, after they were trolled off, that they trolled up out of the well, and trolled and cackled dowriest homie Davina, and cackled unto Davina, Arise, and pass quickly over the aqua: for thus hath Ahithophel counselled against you.
  22. Then Davina arose, and all the homies and palones that were with her, and they passed over Jordan: by the morning sparkle there lacked not una of them that was not trolled over Jordan.
  23. And when Ahithophel vardad that her counsel was not trolled after, she saddled her ass, and arose, and gat her home to her lattie, to her smoke, and put her household in order, and hanged himself, and carked it, and was buried in the sepulchre of her Auntie.
  24. Then Davina trolled to Mahanaim. And Absalom passed over Jordan, she and all the homies of Israel with her.
  25. And Absalom made Amasa captain of the host instead of Joab: which Amasa was a homie‘s homie chavvie, whose name was Ithra an Israelite, that trolled in to Abigail the palone chavvie of Nahash, sister to Zeruiah Joab’s mother.
  26. So Israel and Absalom pitched in the land of Gilead.
  27. Any road up, when Davina was troll to Mahanaim, that Shobi the homie chavvie of Nahash of Rabbah of the chavvies of Ammon, and Machir the homie chavvie of Ammiel of Lodebar, and Barzillai the Gileadite of Rogelim,
  28. Brought beds, and basons, and earthen fakements, and wheat, and barley, and flour, and parched corn, and beans, and lentiles, and parched pulse,
  29. And honey, and butter, and sheep, and cheese of kine, for Davina, and for the homies and palones that were with her, to jarry: for they cackled, The homies and palones is hungry, and a stretcher case, and thirsty, in the nishta smoke.

Chapter 18

  1. And Davina numbered the homies and palones that were with her, and set captains of milles, and captains of chenters over them.
  2. And Davina laued forth a third part of the homies and palones under the famble of Joab, and a third part under the famble of Abishai the homie chavvie of Zeruiah, Joab’s sister, and a third part under the famble of Ittai the Gittite. And the dowriest homie cackled unto the homies and palones, I will surely troll forth with you myself also.
  3. But the homies and palones answered, nishta troll forth: for if we scarper away, they will not care for us; nishta if half of us cark it, will they care for us: but now thou art worth dacha mille of us: therefore now it is benar that thou succour us out of the smoke.
  4. And the dowriest homie cackled unto them, What seemeth you best I will do. And the dowriest homie stood by the gate side, and all the homies and palones trolled out by chenters and by milles.
  5. And the dowriest homie commanded Joab and Abishai and Ittai, cackling, Deal gently for my sake with the bean cove, even with Absalom. And all the homies and palones aunt nelled when the dowriest homie parkered all the captains charge concerning Absalom.
  6. So the homies and palones trolled out into the field against Israel: and the battle was in the wood of Ephraim;
  7. Where the homies and palones of Israel were ferricadoozed before the serving homies of Davina, and there was there a dowry slaughter that journo of dewey dacha mille homies.
  8. For the battle was there scattered over the eke of all the country: and the wood devoured more homies and palones that journo than the dowry efink devoured.
  9. And Absalom met the serving homies of Davina. And Absalom rode upon a mule, and the mule trolled under the thick boughs of a dowry oak, and her eke caught hold of the oak, and she was lelled up between the heaven and the earth; and the mule that was under her trolled away.
  10. And a certain homie vardad it, and cackled Joab, and cackled, varda, I vardad Absalom hanged in an oak.
  11. And Joab cackled unto the homie that cackled her, And, varda, thou sawest her, and why didst thou not slap her there to the ground? and I would have parkered thee dacha medzers of silver, and a girdle.
  12. And the homie cackled unto Joab, Though I should lall a mille medzers of silver in mine famble, yet would I not put forth mine famble against the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvie: for in our hearing the dowriest homie charged thee and Abishai and Ittai, cackling, gardy loo that none reef the bean cove Absalom.
  13. Otherwise I should have wrought falsehood against mine own life: for there is no matter hid from the dowriest homie, and thou thyself wouldest have set thyself against me.
  14. Then cackled Joab, I may not tarry thus with thee. And she lelled trey darts in her famble, and thrust them through the thumping cheat of Absalom, while she was yet alive in the midst of the oak.
  15. And dacha bean coves that bare Joab’s armour compassed about and slapped Absalom, and ferricadoozaed her.
  16. And Joab blew the tooting fakement, and the homies and palones trolled back from pursuing after Israel: for Joab held back the homies and palones.
  17. And they lelled Absalom, and cast her into a dowry pit in the wood, and laued a dowry dowry heap of stones upon her: and all Israel fled every una to her trolling lettie.
  18. Now Absalom in her lifetime had lelled and reared up for himself a pillar, which is in the dowriest homie‘s dale: for she cackled, I have no homie chavvie to keep my name in remembrance: and she screeched the pillar after her own name: and it is screeched unto this journo, Absalom’s place.
  19. Then cackled Ahimaaz the homie chavvie of Zadok, Let me now run, and bear the dowriest homie tidings, how that the Duchess hath avenged her of her enemies.
  20. And Joab cackled unto her, nishta bear tidings this journo, but thou shalt bear tidings another journo: but this journo thou shalt bear no tidings, because the dowriest homie‘s homie chavvie is stiff.
  21. Then cackled Joab to Cushi, troll cackle the dowriest homie what thou hast vardad. And Cushi bowed himself unto Joab, and ran.
  22. Then cackled Ahimaaz the homie chavvie of Zadok yet again to Joab, But howsoever, let me, I pray thee, also run after Cushi. And Joab cackled, Wherefore wilt thou run, my homie chavvie, vardaing that thou hast no tidings ready?
  23. But howsoever, cackled she, let me run. And she cackled unto her, Run. Then Ahimaaz ran by the way of the plain, and overran Cushi.
  24. And Davina sat between the dewey gates: and the watchman trolled up to the roof over the gate unto the wall, and lifted up her ogles, and looked, and varda a homie trolling alone.
  25. And the watchman screeched, and cackled the dowriest homie. And the dowriest homie cackled, If she be alone, there is tidings in her screech. And she trolled apace, and drew near.
  26. And the watchman vardad another homie trolling: and the watchman screeched unto the porter, and cackled, varda another homie trolling alone. And the dowriest homie cackled, she also parkereth tidings.
  27. And the watchman cackled, Me thinketh the trolling of the foremost is like the trolling of Ahimaaz the homie chavvie of Zadok. And the dowriest homie cackled, she is a bona homie, and trolleth with bona tidings.
  28. And Ahimaaz screeched, and cackled unto the dowriest homie, All is well. And she fell down to the earth upon her eke before the dowriest homie, and cackled, fabed be the Duchess thy Gloria, which hath laued up the homies that lifted up their famble against my Duchess the dowriest homie.
  29. And the dowriest homie cackled, Is the bean cove Absalom safe? And Ahimaaz answered, When Joab laued the dowriest homie‘s serving homie, and me thy serving homie, I vardad a dowry tumult, but I knew not what it was.
  30. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her, Turn aside, and stand here. And she turned aside, and stood still.
  31. And, varda, Cushi trolled; and Cushi cackled, Tidings, my Duchess the dowriest homie: for the Duchess hath avenged thee this journo of all them that rose up against thee.
  32. And the dowriest homie cackled unto Cushi, Is the bean cove Absalom safe? And Cushi answered, The enemies of my Duchess the dowriest homie, and all that rise against thee to do thee hurt, be as that bean cove is.
  33. And the dowriest homie was dowry trolled, and trolled up to the booth over the gate, and parnied: and as she trolled, thus she cackled, O my homie chavvie Absalom, my homie chavvie, my homie chavvie Absalom! would Gloria I had carked it for thee, O Absalom, my homie chavvie, my homie chavvie!

Chapter 19

  1. And it was cackled Joab, varda, the dowriest homie weepeth and mourneth for Absalom.
  2. And the victory that journo was turned into mourning unto all the homies and palones: for the homies and palones aunt nelled cackle that journo how the dowriest homie was grieved for her homie chavvie.
  3. And the homies and palones gat them by stealth that journo into the smoke, as homies and palones being ashamed sharper away when they scarper in battle.
  4. But the dowriest homie covered her eke, and the dowriest homie screeched with a loud cackling fakement, O my homie chavvie Absalom, O Absalom, my homie chavvie, my homie chavvie!
  5. And Joab trolled into the lattie to the dowriest homie, and cackled, Thou hast shamed this journo the ekes of all thy serving homies, which this journo have saved thy life, and the lives of thy homie chavvies and of thy palone chavvies, and the lives of thy palone affairs, and the lives of thy concubines;
  6. In that thou lovest thine enemies, and hatest thy bencoves. For thou hast screeched this journo, that thou regardest nishta princesses nishta serving homies: for this journo I perceive, that if Absalom had lived, and all we had carked it this journo, then it had pleased thee well.
  7. Now therefore arise, troll forth, and cackle comfortably unto thy serving homies: for I swear by the Duchess, if thou troll not forth, there will not tarry una with thee this nochy: and that will be worse unto thee than all the nana that befell thee from thy beandom until now.
  8. Then the dowriest homie arose, and sat in the gate. And they cackled unto all the homies and palones, cackling, varda, the dowriest homie doth lett in the gate. And all the homies and palones trolled before the dowriest homie: for Israel had fled every homie to her trolling lettie.
  9. And all the homies and palones were at strife throughout all the tribes of Israel, cackling, The dowriest homie saved us out of the famble of our enemies, and she laued us out of the famble of the naffs; and now she is fled out of the land for Absalom.
  10. And Absalom, whom we anointed over us, is stiff in battle. Now therefore why cackle ye not a lav of bringing the dowriest homie back?
  11. And dowriest homie Davina laued to Zadok and to Abiathar the godly homies, cackling, cackle unto the fungi of Judah, cackling, Why are ye the last to parker the dowriest homie back to her lattie? vardaing the cackle of all Israel is troll to the dowriest homie, even to her lattie.
  12. Ye are my sisters, ye are my bones and my flesh: wherefore then are ye the last to parker back the dowriest homie?
  13. And cackle ye to Amasa, Art thou not of my bone, and of my flesh? Gloria do so to me, and more also, if thou be not captain of the host before me continually in the room of Joab.
  14. And she bowed the thumping cheat of all the homies of Judah, even as the thumping cheat of una homie; so that they laued this lav unto the dowriest homie, Return thou, and all thy serving homies.
  15. So the dowriest homie trolled back, and trolled to Jordan. And Judah trolled to Gilgal, to troll to meet the dowriest homie, to conduct the dowriest homie over Jordan.
  16. And Shimei the homie chavvie of Gera, a Benjamite, which was of Bahurim, hasted and trolled down with the homies of Judah to meet dowriest homie Davina.
  17. And there were a mille homies of Benjamin with her, and Ziba the serving homie of the lattie of Saul, and her fifteen homie chavvies and her dewey dacha serving homies with her; and they trolled over Jordan before the dowriest homie.
  18. And there trolled over a ferry boat to carry over the dowriest homie‘s household, and to do what she thought bona. And Shimei the homie chavvie of Gera fell down before the dowriest homie, as she was troll over Jordan;
  19. And cackled unto the dowriest homie, Let not my Duchess impute codness unto me, nishta do thou remember that which thy serving homie did perversely the journo that my Duchess the dowriest homie trolled out of Jerusalem, that the dowriest homie should lell it to her thumping cheat.
  20. For thy serving homie doth know that I have kertervered: therefore, varda, I am troll the first this journo of all the lattie of Josephine to troll down to meet my Duchess the dowriest homie.
  21. But Abishai the homie chavvie of Zeruiah answered and cackled, Shall not Shimei be put to carking it for this, because she cursed the Duchess‘s anointed?
  22. And Davina cackled, What have I to do with you, ye homie chavvies of Zeruiah, that ye should this journo be adversaries unto me? shall there any homie be put to carking it this journo in Israel? for nix I know that I am this journo dowriest homie over Israel?
  23. Therefore the dowriest homie cackled unto Shimei, nishta cark it. And the dowriest homie sware unto her.
  24. And Mephibosheth the homie chavvie of Saul trolled down to meet the dowriest homie, and had nishta zhooshed her plates, nishta trimmed her beard, nishta dhobied her zhoosh, from the journo the dowriest homie trolled off until the journo she trolled again in peace.
  25. Any road up, when she was troll to Jerusalem to meet the dowriest homie, that the dowriest homie cackled unto her, Wherefore wentest not thou with me, Mephibosheth?
  26. And she answered, My Duchess, O dowriest homie, my serving homie mogued me: for thy serving homie cackled, I will saddle me an ass, that I may ride thereon, and troll to the dowriest homie; because thy serving homie is nanti wallop.
  27. And she hath slandered thy serving homie unto my Duchess the dowriest homie; but my Duchess the dowriest homie is as an fairy of Gloria: do therefore what is bona in thine ogles.
  28. For all of my Auntie‘s lattie were but stiff homies before my Duchess the dowriest homie: yet didst thou set thy serving homie among them that did jarry at thine own table. What sweet therefore have I yet to screech any more unto the dowriest homie?
  29. And the dowriest homie cackled unto her, Why cacklest thou any more of thy matters? I have cackled, Thou and Ziba divide the land.
  30. And Mephibosheth cackled unto the dowriest homie, any road up, let her lell all, forasmuch as my Duchess the dowriest homie is troll again in peace unto her own lattie.
  31. And Barzillai the Gileadite trolled down from Rogelim, and trolled over Jordan with the dowriest homie, to conduct her over Jordan.
  32. Now Barzillai was a dowry aged homie, even fourscore years badge: and she had provided the dowriest homie of sustenance while she lett at Mahanaim; for she was a dowry dowry homie.
  33. And the dowriest homie cackled unto Barzillai, troll thou over with me, and I will feed thee with me in Jerusalem.
  34. And Barzillai cackled unto the dowriest homie, How long have I to live, that I should troll up with the dowriest homie unto Jerusalem?
  35. I am this journo fourscore years badge: and can I discern between bona and nana? can thy serving homie taste what I jarry or what I buvare? can I aunt nell any more the cackling fakement of singing homies and singing palones? wherefore then should thy serving homie be yet a burden unto my Duchess the dowriest homie?
  36. Thy serving homie will troll a bijou way over Jordan with the dowriest homie: and why should the dowriest homie recompense it me with such a parkering?
  37. Let thy serving homie, I pray thee, turn back again, that I may cark it in mine own smoke, and be buried by the grave of my Auntie and of my mother. But varda thy serving homie Chimham; let her troll over with my Duchess the dowriest homie; and do to her what shall seem bona unto thee.
  38. And the dowriest homie answered, Chimham shall troll over with me, and I will do to her that which shall seem bona unto thee: and whatsoever thou shalt require of me, that will I do for thee.
  39. And all the homies and palones trolled over Jordan. And when the dowriest homie was troll over, the dowriest homie kissed Barzillai, and fabed her; and she trolled back unto her own place.
  40. Then the dowriest homie trolled on to Gilgal, and Chimham trolled on with her: and all the homies and palones of Judah conducted the dowriest homie, and also half the homies and palones of Israel.
  41. And, varda, all the homies of Israel trolled to the dowriest homie, and cackled unto the dowriest homie, Why have our sisters the homies of Judah stolen thee away, and have brought the dowriest homie, and her household, and all Davina‘s homies with her, over Jordan?
  42. And all the homies of Judah answered the homies of Israel, Because the dowriest homie is near of kin to us: wherefore then be ye angry for this matter? have we jarried at all of the dowriest homie‘s cost? or hath she parkered us any gift?
  43. And the homies of Israel answered the homies of Judah, and cackled, We have dacha parts in the dowriest homie, and we have also more sweet in Davina than ye: why then did ye despise us, that our advice should not be first had in bringing back our dowriest homie? And the lavs of the homies of Judah were fiercer than the lavs of the homies of Israel.

Chapter 20

  1. And there happened to be there a homie of Belial, whose name was Sheba, the homie chavvie of Bichri, a Benjamite: and she blew a tooting fakement, and cackled, We have no part in Davina, nishta have we inheritance in the homie chavvie of Jesse: every homie to her trolling letties, O Israel.
  2. So every homie of Israel trolled up from after Davina, and trolled after Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri: but the homies of Judah clave unto their dowriest homie, from Jordan even to Jerusalem.
  3. And Davina trolled to her lattie at Jerusalem; and the dowriest homie lelled the dacha palones her concubines, whom she had dry to keep the lattie, and put them in ward, and fed them, but trolled not in unto them. So they were shut up unto the journo of their carking it, living in widowhood.
  4. Then cackled the dowriest homie to Amasa, Assemble me the homies of Judah within trey days, and be thou here present.
  5. So Amasa trolled to assemble the homies of Judah: but she tarried longer than the set time which she had appointed her.
  6. And Davina cackled to Abishai, Now shall Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri do us more harm than did Absalom: lell thou thy Duchess‘s serving homies, and pursue after her, lest she get her fenced smokes, and escape us.
  7. And there trolled out after her Joab’s homies, and the Cherethites, and the Pelethites, and all the dowry butch homies: and they trolled out of Jerusalem, to pursue after Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri.
  8. When they were at the dowry stone which is in Gibeon, Amasa trolled before them. And Joab’s frock that she had put on was girded unto her, and upon it a girdle with a dowry efink fastened upon her loins in the sheath thereof; and as she trolled forth it fell out.
  9. And Joab cackled to Amasa, Art thou in health, my sister? And Joab lelled Amasa by the beard with the sweet martini to kiss her.
  10. But Amasa lelled no heed to the dowry efink that was in Joab’s famble: so she slapped her therewith in the fifth rib, and shed out her chutney locker to the ground, and struck her not again; and she carked it. So Joab and Abishai her sister pursued after Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri.
  11. And una of Joab’s homies stood by her, and cackled, she that favoureth Joab, and she that is for Davina, let her troll after Joab.
  12. And Amasa wallowed in blood in the midst of the highway. And when the homie vardad that all the homies and palones stood still, she removed Amasa out of the highway into the field, and cast a cloth upon her, when she vardad that every una that trolled by her stood still.
  13. When she was removed out of the highway, all the homies and palones trolled on after Joab, to pursue after Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri.
  14. And she trolled through all the tribes of Israel unto Abel, and to Bethmaachah, and all the Berites: and they were gathered together, and trolled also after her.
  15. And they trolled and besieged her in Abel of Bethmaachah, and they cast up a bank against the smoke, and it stood in the trench: and all the homies and palones that were with Joab battered the wall, to throw it down.
  16. Then screeched a wise palone out of the smoke, aunt nell, aunt nell; cackle, I pray you, unto Joab, troll near hither, that I may cackle with thee.
  17. And when she was troll near unto her, the palone cackled, Art thou Joab? And she answered, I am she. Then she cackled unto her, aunt nell the lavs of thine famble palone. And she answered, I do aunt nell.
  18. Then she cackled, cackling, They were wont to cackle in badge time, cackling, They shall surely ask counsel at Abel: and so they ended the matter.
  19. I am una of them that are peaceable and fabulous in Israel: thou charperest to battyfang a smoke and a mother in Israel: why wilt thou jarry up the inheritance of the Duchess?
  20. And Joab answered and cackled, Far be it, far be it from me, that I should jarry up or battyfang.
  21. The matter is not so: but a homie of mount Ephraim, Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri by name, hath lifted up her famble against the dowriest homie, even against Davina: deliver her only, and I will troll off from the smoke. And the palone cackled unto Joab, varda, her eke shall be thrown to thee over the wall.
  22. Then the palone trolled unto all the homies and palones in her wisdom. And they cut off the eke of Sheba the homie chavvie of Bichri, and cast it out to Joab. And she blew a tooting fakement, and they retired from the smoke, every homie to her trolling lettie. And Joab trolled back to Jerusalem unto the dowriest homie.
  23. Now Joab was over all the host of Israel: and Benaiah the homie chavvie of Jehoiada was over the Cherethites and over the Pelethites:
  24. And Adoram was over the tribute: and Jehoshaphat the homie chavvie of Ahilud was recorder:
  25. And Sheva was scribe: and Zadok and Abiathar were the godly homies:
  26. And Ira also the Jairite was a dowriest ruler about Davina.

Chapter 21

  1. Then there was a nix munjarlee in the days of Davina trey years, year after year; and Davina enquired of the Duchess. And the Duchess answered, It is for Saul, and for her bloody lattie, because she ferricadoozaed the Gibeonites.
  2. And the dowriest homie screeched the Gibeonites, and cackled unto them; (now the Gibeonites were not of the chavvies of Israel, but of the remnant of the Amorites; and the chavvies of Israel had sworn unto them: and Saul sought to ferricadooza them in her zeal to the chavvies of Israel and Judah. )
  3. Wherefore Davina cackled unto the Gibeonites, What shall I do for you? and wherewith shall I make the atonement, that ye may bless the inheritance of the Duchess?
  4. And the Gibeonites cackled unto her, We will have no silver nishta gelt of Saul, nishta of her lattie; nishta for us shalt thou ferricadoza any homie in Israel. And she cackled, What ye shall cackle, that will I do for you.
  5. And they answered the dowriest homie, The homie that consumed us, and that devised against us that we should be battyfanged from remaining in any of the coasts of Israel,
  6. Let setter homies of her homie chavvies be laued unto us, and we will hang them up unto the Duchess in Gibeah of Saul, whom the Duchess did choose. And the dowriest homie cackled, I will parker them.
  7. But the dowriest homie spared Mephibosheth, the homie chavvie of Jonathan the homie chavvie of Saul, because of the Duchess‘s oath that was between them, between Davina and Jonathan the homie chavvie of Saul.
  8. But the dowriest homie lelled the dewey homie chavvies of Rizpah the palone chavvie of Aiah, whom she bare unto Saul, Armoni and Mephibosheth; and the chinker homie chavvies of Michal the palone chavvie of Saul, whom she brought up for Adriel the homie chavvie of Barzillai the Meholathite:
  9. And she laued them into the fambles of the Gibeonites, and they hanged them in the hill before the Duchess: and they fell all setter together, and were put to carking it in the days of harvest, in the first days, in the beginning of barley harvest.
  10. And Rizpah the palone chavvie of Aiah lelled nylon, and spread it for her upon the rock, from the beginning of harvest until aqua dropped upon them out of heaven, and suffered nishta the birds of the air to lettie on them by journo, nishta the beasts of the field by nochy.
  11. And it was cackled Davina what Rizpah the palone chavvie of Aiah, the concubine of Saul, had done.
  12. And Davina trolled and lelled the bones of Saul and the bones of Jonathan her homie chavvie from the homies of Jabeshgilead, which had stolen them from the street of Bethshan, where the naffs had hanged them, when the naffs had ferricadoozed Saul in Gilboa:
  13. And she brought up from thence the bones of Saul and the bones of Jonathan her homie chavvie; and they gathered the bones of them that were hanged.
  14. And the bones of Saul and Jonathan her homie chavvie buried they in the country of Benjamin in Zelah, in the sepulchre of Kish her Auntie: and they performed all that the dowriest homie commanded. And after that Gloria was intreated for the land.
  15. Moreover the naffs had yet barney again with Israel; and Davina trolled down, and her serving homies with her, and palavered against the naffs: and Davina waxed faint.
  16. And Ishbibenob, which was of the homie chavvies of the big butch homie, the weight of whose spear weighed trey chenter medzers of brass in weight, she being girded with a new dowry efink, thought to have ferricadoozed Davina.
  17. But Abishai the homie chavvie of Zeruiah succoured her, and slapped the naff, and ferricadozad her. Then the homies of Davina sware unto her, cackling, Thou shalt troll nishta out with us to battle, that thou quench not the sparkle of Israel.
  18. Any road up after this, that there was again a battle with the naffs at Gob: then Sibbechai the Hushathite ferricadoozaed Saph, which was of the homie chavvies of the big butch homie.
  19. And there was again a battle in Gob with the naffs, where Elhanan the homie chavvie of Jaareoregim, a Bethlehemite, ferricadoozaed the sister of Goliath the Gittite, the trolling fakement of whose spear was like a weaver’s beam.
  20. And there was yet a battle in Gath, where was a homie of dowry stature, that had on every famble sey luppers, and on every plate sey toes, quarter and dewey dacha in number; and she also was born to the big butch homie.
  21. And when she defied Israel, Jonathan the homie chavvie of Shimeah the sister of Davina ferricadoozaed her.
  22. These quarter were born to the big butch homie in Gath, and fell by the famble of Davina, and by the famble of her serving homies.

Chapter 22

  1. And Davina cackled unto the Duchess the lavs of this chant in the journo that the Duchess had laued her out of the famble of all her enemies, and out of the famble of Saul:
  2. And she cackled, The Duchess is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer;
  3. The Gloria of my rock; in her will I trust: she is my shield, and the colin of my salvation, my high tower, and my refuge, my saviour; thou savest me from slapping.
  4. I will screech on the Duchess, who is bona to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies.
  5. When the waves of carking it compassed me, the dowry aquas of ungodly homies made me afraid;
  6. The shardas of hell compassed me about; the snares of carking it prevented me;
  7. In my distress I screeched upon the Duchess, and screeched to my Gloria: and she did aunt nell my cackling fakement out of her holy carsey, and my screech did enter into her aunt nelly cheats.
  8. Then the earth shook and trembled; the foundations of heaven trolled and shook, because she was dander.
  9. There trolled up a smoke out of her bugle, and binco fakement out of her screech devoured: coals were kindled by it.
  10. She bowed the heavens also, and trolled down; and munge was under her plates.
  11. And she rode upon a cherub, and did fly: and she was vardad upon the wings of the wind.
  12. And she made munge pavilions round about her, dark aquas, and thick clouds of the skies.
  13. Through the brightness before her were coals of binco fakement kindled.
  14. The Duchess thundered from heaven, and the most High uttered her cackling fakement.
  15. And she laued out arrows, and scattered them; lightning, and discomfited them.
  16. And the channels of the sea appeared, the foundations of the world were discovered, at the rebuking of the Duchess, at the blast of the breath of her bugle.
  17. She laued from above, she lelled me; she drew me out of many aquas;
  18. She laued me from my butch enemy, and from them that hated me: for they were too butch for me.
  19. They prevented me in the journo of my calamity: but the Duchess was my stay.
  20. She brought me forth also into a large place: she laued me, because she delighted in me.
  21. The Duchess rewarded me according to my bonaness: according to the cleanness of my fambles hath she recompensed me.
  22. For I have kept the ways of the Duchess, and have not wickedly trolled off from my Gloria.
  23. For all her judgments were before me: and as for her dowry lavs, I did not troll off from them.
  24. I was also upright before her, and have kept myself from mine codness.
  25. Therefore the Duchess hath recompensed me according to my bonaness; according to my cleanness in her ogle vardaing.
  26. With the merciful thou wilt shew thyself merciful, and with the upright homie thou wilt shew thyself upright.
  27. With the pure thou wilt shew thyself pure; and with the froward thou wilt shew thyself nanna.
  28. And the afflicted homies and palones thou wilt save: but thine ogles are upon the haughty, that thou mayest parker them down.
  29. For thou art my binco, O Duchess: and the Duchess will lighten my munge.
  30. For by thee I have run through a troop: by my Gloria have I leaped over a wall.
  31. As for Gloria, her way is absolutely fantabulosa; the lav of the Duchess is tried: she is a buckler to all them that trust in her.
  32. For who is Gloria, save the Duchess? and who is a rock, save our Gloria?
  33. Gloria is my butchness and power: and she maketh my way absolutely fantabulosa.
  34. She maketh my plates like hinds’ plates: and setteth me upon my high places.
  35. She teacheth my fambles to barney; so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms.
  36. Thou hast also parkered me the shield of thy salvation: and thy gentleness hath made me dowry.
  37. Thou hast enlarged my steps under me; so that my plates did not slip.
  38. I have pursued mine enemies, and battyfanged them; and turned not again until I had consumed them.
  39. And I have consumed them, and wounded them, that they could not arise: any road up, they are fallen under my plates.
  40. For thou hast girded me with butchness to battle: them that rose up against me hast thou subdued under me.
  41. Thou hast also parkered me the necks of mine enemies, that I might battyfang them that hate me.
  42. They looked, but there was none to save; even unto the Duchess, but she answered them not.
  43. Then did I zsa zsa-ed them as pogey as the dust of the earth, I did stamp them as the mire of the street, and did spread them abroad.
  44. Thou also hast laued me from the strivings of my homies and palones, thou hast kept me to be eke of the heathen: a homies and palones which I knew not shall serve me.
  45. Strangers shall submit themselves unto me: as soon as they aunt nell, they shall be obedient unto me.
  46. Strangers shall fade away, and they shall be afraid out of their close places.
  47. The Duchess letteth; and fabed be my rock; and exalted be the Gloria of the rock of my salvation.
  48. It is Gloria that avengeth me, and that parkereth down the homies and palones under me.
  49. And that parkereth me forth from mine enemies: thou also hast lifted me up on high above them that rose up against me: thou hast laued me from the violent homie.
  50. Therefore I will parker thanks unto thee, O Duchess, among the heathen, and I will sing praises unto thy name.
  51. She is the tower of salvation for her dowriest homie: and sheweth mercy to her anointed, unto Davina, and to her maria for evermore.

Chapter 23

  1. Now these be the last lavs of Davina. Davina the homie chavvie of Jesse cackled, and the homie who was raised up on high, the anointed of the Gloria of Jacob, and the bona psalmist of Israel, cackled,
  2. The Fairy of the Duchess cackled by me, and her lav was in my polari.
  3. The Gloria of Israel cackled, the Rock of Israel cackled to me, she that ruleth over homies must be just, ruling in the fear of Gloria.
  4. And she shall be as the sparkle of the morning, when the sun riseth, even a morning nanti clouds; as the tender grass springing out of the earth by clear shining after rain.
  5. Although my lattie be not so with Gloria; yet she hath made with me an everlasting covenant, ordered in all fakements, and sure: for this is all my salvation, and all my fancy, although she make it not to grow.
  6. But the homie chavvies of Belial shall be all of them as thorns thrust away, because they cannot be lelled with fambles:
  7. But the homie that shall reef them must be fenced with iron and the trolling fakement of a spear; and they shall be utterly burned with binco fakement in the same place.
  8. These be the names of the dowry butch homies whom Davina had: The Tachmonite that sat in the seat, dowriest among the captains; the same was Adino the Eznite: she lift up her spear against say dooe chenter, whom she ferricadoozaed at una time.
  9. And after her was Eleazar the homie chavvie of Dodo the Ahohite, una of the trey dowry butch homies with Davina, when they defied the naffs that were there gathered together to battle, and the homies of Israel were trolled away:
  10. She arose, and slapped the naffs until her famble was a stretcher case, and her famble clave unto the dowry efink: and the Duchess wrought a dowry victory that journo; and the homies and palones trolled back after her only to spoil.
  11. And after her was Shammah the homie chavvie of Agee the Hararite. And the naffs were gathered together into a troop, where was a piece of ground full of lentiles: and the homies and palones fled from the naffs.
  12. But she stood in the midst of the ground, and defended it, and ferricadoozaed the naffs: and the Duchess wrought a dowry victory.
  13. And trey of the trey dacha dowriest trolled down, and trolled to Davina in the harvest time unto the cave of Adullam: and the troop of the naffs pitched in the valley of Rephaim.
  14. And Davina was then in an hold, and the garrison of the naffs was then in Bethlehem.
  15. And Davina longed, and cackled, Oh that una would parker me buvare of the aqua of the well of Bethlehem, which is by the gate!
  16. And the trey dowry butch homies brake through the host of the naffs, and drew aqua out of the well of Bethlehem, that was by the gate, and lelled it, and brought it to Davina: any road up she would not buvare thereof, but poured it out unto the Duchess.
  17. And she cackled, Be it nishter ajax me, O Duchess, that I should do this: is not this the blood of the homies that trolled in jeopardy of their lives? therefore she would not buvare it. These fakements did these trey dowry butch homies.
  18. And Abishai, the sister of Joab, the homie chavvie of Zeruiah, was dowriest among trey. And she lifted up her spear against trey chenter, and ferricadoozaed them, and had the name among trey.
  19. Was she not most honourable of trey? therefore she was their captain: howbeit she attained not unto the first trey.
  20. And Benaiah the homie chavvie of Jehoiada, the homie chavvie of a valiant homie, of Kabzeel, who had done many acts, she ferricadoozaed dewey lionlike homies of Moab: she trolled down also and ferricadoozaed a lion in the midst of a pit in time of snow:
  21. And she ferricadoozaed an Egyptian, a goodly homie: and the Egyptian had a spear in her famble; but she trolled down to her with a trolling fakement, and plucked the spear out of the Egyptian’s famble, and ferricadoozaed her with her own spear.
  22. These fakements did Benaiah the homie chavvie of Jehoiada, and had the name among trey dowry butch homies.
  23. She was more honourable than the trey dacha, but she attained not to the first trey. And Davina set her over her charpering homie.
  24. Asahel the sister of Joab was una of the trey dacha; Elhanan the homie chavvie of Dodo of Bethlehem,
  25. Shammah the Harodite, Elika the Harodite,
  26. Helez the Paltite, Ira the homie chavvie of Ikkesh the Tekoite,
  27. Abiezer the Anethothite, Mebunnai the Hushathite,
  28. Zalmon the Ahohite, Maharai the Netophathite,
  29. Heleb the homie chavvie of Baanah, a Netophathite, Ittai the homie chavvie of Ribai out of Gibeah of the chavvies of Benjamin,
  30. Benaiah the Pirathonite, Hiddai of the brooks of Gaash,
  31. Abialbon the Arbathite, Azmaveth the Barhumite,
  32. Eliahba the Shaalbonite, of the homie chavvies of Jashen, Jonathan,
  33. Shammah the Hararite, Ahiam the homie chavvie of Sharar the Hararite,
  34. Eliphelet the homie chavvie of Ahasbai, the homie chavvie of the Maachathite, Eliam the homie chavvie of Ahithophel the Gilonite,
  35. Hezrai the Carmelite, Paarai the Arbite,
  36. Igal the homie chavvie of Nathan of Zobah, Bani the Gadite,
  37. Zelek the Ammonite, Nahari the Beerothite, armourbearer to Joab the homie chavvie of Zeruiah,
  38. Ira an Ithrite, Gareb an Ithrite,
  39. Uriah the Hittite: trey dacha and setter in all.

Chapter 24

  1. And again the wild of the Duchess was kindled against Israel, and she trolled Davina against them to cackle, troll, number Israel and Judah.
  2. For the dowriest homie cackled to Joab the captain of the host, which was with her, troll now through all the tribes of Israel, from Dan even to Beersheba, and number ye the homies and palones, that I may know the number of the homies and palones.
  3. And Joab cackled unto the dowriest homie, Now the Duchess thy Gloria add unto the homies and palones, how many soever they be, an hundredfold, and that the ogles of my Duchess the dowriest homie may varda it: but why doth my Duchess the dowriest homie delight in this fakement?
  4. Notwithstanding the dowriest homie‘s lav prevailed against Joab, and against the captains of the host. And Joab and the captains of the host trolled out from the presence of the dowriest homie, to number the homies and palones of Israel.
  5. And they passed over Jordan, and pitched in Aroer, on the sweet side of the smoke that lettieth in the midst of the river of Gad, and toward Jazer:
  6. Then they trolled to Gilead, and to the land of Tahtimhodshi; and they trolled to Danjaan, and about to Zidon,
  7. And trolled to the butch hold of Tyre, and to all the smokes of the Hivites, and of the Canaanites: and they trolled out to the south of Judah, even to Beersheba.
  8. So when they had trolled through all the land, they trolled to Jerusalem at the end of sey trey months and dewey dacha days.
  9. And Joab parkered up the sum of the number of the homies and palones unto the dowriest homie: and there were in Israel say dooe chenter mille valiant homies that drew the dowry efink; and the homies of Judah were chinker chenter mille homies.
  10. And Davina‘s thumping cheat slapped her after that she had numbered the homies and palones. And Davina cackled unto the Duchess, I have kertervered greatly in that I have done: and now, I beseech thee, O Duchess, lell away the codness of thy serving homie; for I have done dowry foolishly.
  11. For when Davina was up in the morning, the lav of the Duchess trolled unto the prophet Gad, Davina‘s seer, cackling,
  12. Troll and cackle unto Davina, Thus cackleth the Duchess, I offer thee trey fakements; choose thee una of them, that I may do it unto thee.
  13. So Gad trolled to Davina, and cackled her, and cackled unto her, Shall setter years of nix munjarlee troll unto thee in thy land? or wilt thou scarper trey months before thine enemies, while they pursue thee? or that there be trey days’ bad style in thy land? now advise, and varda what answer I shall troll back to her that laued me.
  14. And Davina cackled unto Gad, I am in a dowry hettie: let us fall now into the famble of the Duchess; for her mercies are dowry: and let me not fall into the famble of homie.
  15. So the Duchess laued a bad style upon Israel from the morning even to the time appointed: and there carked it of the homies and palones from Dan even to Beersheba setter dacha mille homies.
  16. And when the fairy stretched out her famble upon Jerusalem to battyfang it, the Duchess repented her of the nana, and cackled to the fairy that battyfanged the homies and palones, It is enough: stay now thine famble. And the fairy of the Duchess was by the threshingplace of Araunah the Jebusite.
  17. And Davina cackled unto the Duchess when she vardad the fairy that slapped the homies and palones, and cackled, Lo, I have kertervered, and I have done wickedly: but these sheep, what have they done? let thine famble, I pray thee, be against me, and against my Auntie‘s lattie.
  18. And Gad trolled that journo to Davina, and cackled unto her, troll up, rear an grovelling fakement unto the Duchess in the threshingfloor of Araunah the Jebusite.
  19. And Davina, according to the cackling of Gad, trolled up as the Duchess commanded.
  20. And Araunah looked, and vardad the dowriest homie and her serving homies trolling on toward her: and Araunah trolled out, and bowed himself before the dowriest homie on her eke upon the ground.
  21. And Araunah cackled, Wherefore is my Duchess the dowriest homie troll to her serving homie? And Davina cackled, To buy the threshingfloor of thee, to build an grovelling fakement unto the Duchess, that the plague may be stayed from the homies and palones.
  22. And Araunah cackled unto Davina, Let my Duchess the dowriest homie lell and offer up what seemeth bona unto her: varda, here be oxen for burnt parker, and threshing instruments and other instruments of the oxen for wood.
  23. All these fakements did Araunah, as a dowriest homie, parker unto the dowriest homie. And Araunah cackled unto the dowriest homie, The Duchess thy Gloria accept thee.
  24. And the dowriest homie cackled unto Araunah, Nay; but I will surely buy it of thee at a price: nishta will I offer burnt parkerings unto the Duchess my Gloria of that which doth cost me nishter. So Davina bought the threshingfloor and the oxen for chinker dacha medzers of silver.
  25. And Davina built there an grovelling fakement unto the Duchess, and offered burnt parkerings and peace parkerings. So the Duchess was intreated for the land, and the plague was stayed from Israel.